01-03-2021, 01:28 AM
(This post was last modified: 01-03-2021, 01:31 AM by ROXANNE R..)
Roxanne felt herself holding her breath as she rose from where she laid, a sleepless night, she didn't know why it was bothering her so much but she was unable to find sleep those first few nights after discovering that her beloved niece, one she had sworn to protect, couldn't even remember her. Roxanne felt that was her fault... She had been there yet her actions hadn't been quick enough to safe Goldenluxury, she walked out onto the beach glancing over at the moon that was shining down on the ocean. The smell of salt water brushing against her nostrils, she drew closer until the water lapped at her paws and would stand there in silence remembering how many times she had come close to the shore to seek its comfort. She had always found herself here whenever she was troubled, Roxie knew that she had done it so many times. Her chest felt empty in that moment wishing silently that it had been her to lose her memory over Goldie yet it was much too late, she had failed her, Pincher, her family, and now her crew. Now, she was expected to rise and become the new captain. It felt wrong, sure, she had worked her way up to become Quartermaster but she was expecting for Goldie to eventually step down by herself not due to an injury that left her with little to no memories. She grit her teeth as she sat there with both of her ears pressed down flat against her skull "I should've tried harder... I failed everyone... And myself,"
The sound of the ocean was soothing yet her chest still felt heavy, her mismatched gaze glancing down briefly to stare at her own reflection seeing how exhausted she truly was in that moment. She was usually very hypocritical of whenever Roan or Goldie never got sleep yet here she was sitting on the beach feeling the exhaustion making her shoulders and body slouch yet her mind was buzzing with several thoughts. She unsheathed a single claw tracing it over the sand as she tried to distract herself, Roxanne had to figure out what to say or do for her people... There was only so much time that they would be left without a captain. "But I am no captain..." She breathed out with a shake of her cranium, she was never going to be a captain like her brother, Pincher Roux, or like her niece, Goldie, it was impossible... She was not a leader, she followed for the most part but her mind would stray to the day where she had gathered everyone at the beach announcing that they would take Tanglewood back and eventually their own home. What was that then? A spur of blind confidence? She was uncertain and it troubled her more. Roxanne Roux always hid behind her confidence and put up a facade... She knew she was just afraid. Her eyes began to sting slightly as her body trembled lightly "I'm not ready... Why now?" She said quietly to no one in particular as the night remained silent.
She lowered her body to the ground with ears pressed flat against her head, Rox would stare out at the ocean trying to silence the thoughts that made her mind tremble. It didn't take long until the sun began to rise and the Quartermaster still lay on the beach but her eyes were half closed still debating over what she was going to do, she supposed that she would have to hold a meeting after the loss of her niece's memories as a soft breath would escape her slowly parting maw. Although, she didn't wish to hold anything and she had barely gotten much sleep but she figured that it was time to get up and actually do something instead of just sulking around. After all, that's what Pincher and Goldie did whenever they were being weighed down by their own thoughts. She knew that they would've handled this a lot better than her, they would've done things a lot better than her and well, they were overall more successful than her... They had built a name for themselves and Roxanne was always but a mere shadow or that's how she felt for the most part. Sometimes, she wished that she had stayed as a shadow yet she simultaneously had climbed through the ranks and claimed her place.
Sure, the draconic feline had worked for the position and all but... Being captain so soon terrified her and when she had been made the Quartermaster of the Typhoon, she hadn't expected for her own reign to come crawling forward and presenting itself to her. It was troublesome to say the least and it pricked at her tired mind as she dragged her paws along the sand with gaze pointed downwards making her way over to where most of the meetings were held. She would spread her wings as she took flight made her way over to the throne, the draconid queen could feel her throat tightened as she landed on top of it feeling the cool surface of the throne touch her pawpads and made the fur on her spine prickle. Roxanne could feel her body beginning to tremble as she stood there refusing to sit just yet, she could feel her nerves starting to act up and it didn't seem to get anger better as the NPC blew the horn for the meeting calling all of those from the Typhoon to gather.
Her entire body grew tense and before anyone could spot her, she immediately hid behind the throne feeling the trembling of her body becoming worse. She didn't know if it had been the sleep she had barely gotten but it was enough to push her over the edge as her breathing grew quick and heavy, the stinging feeling becoming apparent in her eyes as tears threatened to spill. Roxanne would bring her tail close to her body until her nose touched the fluff, she closed her eyes as a few tears began to slip down her cheeks. I should've never been made Quartermaster... I'm a joke... I can't even sit on the throne... I don't belong there, her shaky jumbled thoughts began to spill and her body began to shake as more tears slipped down her face trying to figure out what she was going to do. She should've backed down when she had the chance yet her confidence had always gotten in the way, if only she had bit down on her tongue and thought about it before saying anything.
The small draconic feline pulled her tail closer continuing to hug it as several memories began to drip from her mind, she was overwhelmed and not even Diya was here to comfort her. She shouldn't have come here at all. "I can't do it... I can't do it, Pincher... I don't know how you did it but I just can't... I'm not like you or Goldie..." She sobbed underneath her breath, Rox would open her eyes slowly trying to think of something that would bring her comfort. Anything at this point. She tried to dig throughout her mind and eventually, a few memories were enough to provide her a brief anchor until she was able to collect herself. The tsunami, she had managed to survive that even if she had lost her wings that day... Roxie had still came back home. The meteor shower... How ugly it had been but she had managed to live throughout that... Surely, if she had lived well... Then it meant whoever was up there had different plans for her. Or it had been shitty luck in all those moments but... She was still here.
And even now, after the final raid against the Coalition of the Condemned; Roxanne Roux had lived. The draconic feline had managed to let out a shaky breath as her back leaned against the throne, she lifted a paw up to start wiping away the tears with a soft sniffle leaving her. She would never be Goldenluxury Roux or Pincher Roux, the draconic feline knew this and that was fine... She rose to her paws slowly taking a deep breath and did her best to wipe away the tears from her eyes. She could do this. The Typhoon depended on her now, her crew, family, and Goldie were all waiting on her. With a flap of her wings, she stood on the top of the throne before hopping down until she sat in it. Jeez, was it always this big? Clearing her throat, the Quarterma- no, the Captain would call out in a clear voice "Rise and shine, shitheads. It's time for a meeting and it's being held by yours truly." Once more, she could feel her confidence returning as a shit eating grin presented itself onto her maw. Y'know a girl can get used to this, she thought at last.
tldr: basically, some development for roxie since she didn't feel like she was suited to be captain and eventually, she came to her senses knowing that her crew/family needs her to be strong right now even with the loss of goldie. she has only started the meeting but has yet to make any announcements :0)
The sound of the ocean was soothing yet her chest still felt heavy, her mismatched gaze glancing down briefly to stare at her own reflection seeing how exhausted she truly was in that moment. She was usually very hypocritical of whenever Roan or Goldie never got sleep yet here she was sitting on the beach feeling the exhaustion making her shoulders and body slouch yet her mind was buzzing with several thoughts. She unsheathed a single claw tracing it over the sand as she tried to distract herself, Roxanne had to figure out what to say or do for her people... There was only so much time that they would be left without a captain. "But I am no captain..." She breathed out with a shake of her cranium, she was never going to be a captain like her brother, Pincher Roux, or like her niece, Goldie, it was impossible... She was not a leader, she followed for the most part but her mind would stray to the day where she had gathered everyone at the beach announcing that they would take Tanglewood back and eventually their own home. What was that then? A spur of blind confidence? She was uncertain and it troubled her more. Roxanne Roux always hid behind her confidence and put up a facade... She knew she was just afraid. Her eyes began to sting slightly as her body trembled lightly "I'm not ready... Why now?" She said quietly to no one in particular as the night remained silent.
She lowered her body to the ground with ears pressed flat against her head, Rox would stare out at the ocean trying to silence the thoughts that made her mind tremble. It didn't take long until the sun began to rise and the Quartermaster still lay on the beach but her eyes were half closed still debating over what she was going to do, she supposed that she would have to hold a meeting after the loss of her niece's memories as a soft breath would escape her slowly parting maw. Although, she didn't wish to hold anything and she had barely gotten much sleep but she figured that it was time to get up and actually do something instead of just sulking around. After all, that's what Pincher and Goldie did whenever they were being weighed down by their own thoughts. She knew that they would've handled this a lot better than her, they would've done things a lot better than her and well, they were overall more successful than her... They had built a name for themselves and Roxanne was always but a mere shadow or that's how she felt for the most part. Sometimes, she wished that she had stayed as a shadow yet she simultaneously had climbed through the ranks and claimed her place.
Sure, the draconic feline had worked for the position and all but... Being captain so soon terrified her and when she had been made the Quartermaster of the Typhoon, she hadn't expected for her own reign to come crawling forward and presenting itself to her. It was troublesome to say the least and it pricked at her tired mind as she dragged her paws along the sand with gaze pointed downwards making her way over to where most of the meetings were held. She would spread her wings as she took flight made her way over to the throne, the draconid queen could feel her throat tightened as she landed on top of it feeling the cool surface of the throne touch her pawpads and made the fur on her spine prickle. Roxanne could feel her body beginning to tremble as she stood there refusing to sit just yet, she could feel her nerves starting to act up and it didn't seem to get anger better as the NPC blew the horn for the meeting calling all of those from the Typhoon to gather.
Her entire body grew tense and before anyone could spot her, she immediately hid behind the throne feeling the trembling of her body becoming worse. She didn't know if it had been the sleep she had barely gotten but it was enough to push her over the edge as her breathing grew quick and heavy, the stinging feeling becoming apparent in her eyes as tears threatened to spill. Roxanne would bring her tail close to her body until her nose touched the fluff, she closed her eyes as a few tears began to slip down her cheeks. I should've never been made Quartermaster... I'm a joke... I can't even sit on the throne... I don't belong there, her shaky jumbled thoughts began to spill and her body began to shake as more tears slipped down her face trying to figure out what she was going to do. She should've backed down when she had the chance yet her confidence had always gotten in the way, if only she had bit down on her tongue and thought about it before saying anything.
The small draconic feline pulled her tail closer continuing to hug it as several memories began to drip from her mind, she was overwhelmed and not even Diya was here to comfort her. She shouldn't have come here at all. "I can't do it... I can't do it, Pincher... I don't know how you did it but I just can't... I'm not like you or Goldie..." She sobbed underneath her breath, Rox would open her eyes slowly trying to think of something that would bring her comfort. Anything at this point. She tried to dig throughout her mind and eventually, a few memories were enough to provide her a brief anchor until she was able to collect herself. The tsunami, she had managed to survive that even if she had lost her wings that day... Roxie had still came back home. The meteor shower... How ugly it had been but she had managed to live throughout that... Surely, if she had lived well... Then it meant whoever was up there had different plans for her. Or it had been shitty luck in all those moments but... She was still here.
And even now, after the final raid against the Coalition of the Condemned; Roxanne Roux had lived. The draconic feline had managed to let out a shaky breath as her back leaned against the throne, she lifted a paw up to start wiping away the tears with a soft sniffle leaving her. She would never be Goldenluxury Roux or Pincher Roux, the draconic feline knew this and that was fine... She rose to her paws slowly taking a deep breath and did her best to wipe away the tears from her eyes. She could do this. The Typhoon depended on her now, her crew, family, and Goldie were all waiting on her. With a flap of her wings, she stood on the top of the throne before hopping down until she sat in it. Jeez, was it always this big? Clearing her throat, the Quarterma- no, the Captain would call out in a clear voice "Rise and shine, shitheads. It's time for a meeting and it's being held by yours truly." Once more, she could feel her confidence returning as a shit eating grin presented itself onto her maw. Y'know a girl can get used to this, she thought at last.
tldr: basically, some development for roxie since she didn't feel like she was suited to be captain and eventually, she came to her senses knowing that her crew/family needs her to be strong right now even with the loss of goldie. she has only started the meeting but has yet to make any announcements :0)