• IF HEAVEN WASN’T SO FAR AWAY • resurrection

[Kydobi]

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NOTHING SWEET 'BOUT MY MISERY -
♕tags-powers♕

[OOC: mobile, haven’t slept till 10am yesterday so forgive mistakes PLEASE.

Long story short he got himself out using earth elementals which were just discovered rn ]


Awake.

Conscious.

There was a mental sensation of falling, but no physical confirmation. Something told him he was going to hit the ground. He hit- no collided with something.

A gasp of air and he was back. From a nap? From what? He couldn’t remember... sleep. He must’ve had a deep rest. Lord knows he was exhausted after the battle.

There was nothing before as far as he knew. Nothing. It wasn’t cold but there was a lack of warmth despite the dense air. Kydobi moved to get up and found himself unable to. The brain hadn’t reconnected the wires to the body yet... he was paralyzed. His heart sped up, it made him realize just how slowly it had been going prior... as if turning on after a long while.

He opened his eyes or he thought he did and he saw nothing. Nothing but darkness and fear set in.... what was this? Eyes moved around trying to see something. Nothing. His heart kept speeding up and he wasn’t sure what to do.

God. This panic felt too familiar... where was he! His heart quenched as the fires begin to light inside it hurt having not been ablaze in so long, the pain caused him to gasp only to realize he couldn’t pull in air. Not again not again not again his brain would scream. Not again what? He couldn’t figure it out and yet he knew but he didn’t really know and yet something deep inside him called not again not again find a way out, find a way out, not again.

And it all came rushing back.

A airless, closed scream underground would be heard by no one. Not even himself. All he heard was the roar of his heart. The panic. The pain. The trauma, the... the feeling of death. Of blacking out. Of nothing? Of pulling at anything and everything in an attempt to hold on to life.

Of feeling Aurum rip into his throat. He tried to swallow, dry. There was dirt in his mouth and it got stuck with no water to wash it down. He was dying again. Was this hell? Was this limbo? Forced to live in terror.

What had he done wrong?

Deja vu washed over him... he had woken up before... went back to sleep  again. In this same dark spot. Died from suffocation. Again and again... but he woke up always.

Eternal damnation... was that his fate? Surely he hadn’t- his body was crying. Aching. Air was needed. Blood flow was needed. Movement was vital.

He was dying. Again. Alone.

He had to get out. That much he was sure, people needed him. If memory serves correctly Jervis neede- his thoughts hushed as he remembered who had tripped him. Perhaps there was no need to come back...

And then he remembered Aine, with her vines and her cries and her trying to help him. Jervis was nothing but the child? She was motivation from the start. Then there was August.... Gael... had he lived? Was Aine alone? Bai Shi?

His heart clamores with vigor, he would find a way out! He had to... he just needed to push. He began to dig, progress was slow. His paws were scraping something futilely, however he felt himself rising... felt dirt giving way.

Closer! Closer! He was getting exhausted, his head hurt. But then there was a rumbled and a god awful brightness to the right side of his head he would turn to see the light above him to his right. He was on his side...

It didn’t make sense, and yet he kept going. Quickly he was out, clawing his way above to the side of a tree. He couldn’t reach into his maw but he didn’t want the dirt there. Lodged deep in his throat, a breath was something he still couldn’t have. Out. He imagined the dirt pulling Itself out of his body and... it did. Gagging he spat as it fell onto the ground.

He gasped, breathing as he turned around to see a grave. For him? It was so foreign and terrifying. Who had buried him? Who else was buried? Timidly he crept forward and peered into the hole, to his relieve there was none.

Still breathing heavily he would scrabble away. Eyes wide with terror as he tried to comprehend what was happening... he couldn’t and so he distracted himself and ignored it.

Find the others.


**********

Clumsily, he would walk into the middle of the camp. The air was different and he feared he wouldn’t be welcome, some noticed him... he tried to ignore their stared and chose the floor over their faces for a view.

He wasn’t sure what to do. For all he knew everyone he loved was dead. He smelled her everywhere. Goldie scent stood out like a sore thumb.

Quietly he would sit at the bottom of the strategist temple. Attempting to keep to the shadows...

[sub][W]isker[/sub]

[Crackers]

FOURTHWALL & GLITCHHOP
BLACK-GOLD MOTTLED HELLHOUND / BROWN-GOLD MOTTLED HELLHOUND
MALE - 22 - SOCIAL & VIOLENT / FEMALE - 17 - OBEDIENT & CHEERFUL - THE PITT

______________________________________________________________________________
THEY SAY THAT I AM THE SICK BOY
EASY TO SAY WHEN YOU DON'T TAKE THE RISK, BOY

Fourth had be slowing down quite a bit in the last few days. His stomach was so round at this point that it was evident he was mere days away from giving birth to the young foxes growing within him, and he'd taken to hanging out around camp and patrolling it's edges rather then travelling out to the border to patrol there. He didn't really feel like being stuck out in the middle of nowhere if his water broke and so the black and gold fox didn't go far.

Still bruised and in the process of healing his various bite and claw wounds,  the fox was lounging in the shade of camp, enjoying the warmth that wrapped around him like a blanket despite the winter season. He was doing nothing more than that, just laying there and relaxing, when the murmering of voices caught his attention. The NPCs to his left were staring at something and muttering to themselves, and the Marauder lazily following their gaze with his own and nearly jolted to his paws.

"Kydobi!"

He was moving toward the jaguar at once, his excitement at seeing them alive overriding any ill will. The pair off them may not have seen eye to eye very often, but the melanistic cat was loyal to his friends and had  always done his job in the Pitt, and when he'd been killed our on the battlefield it had never say properly with him.

The cat seemed bewildered and panicked, and the fox wondered just what was going through their head. The scent of earth clung to their pelt and he could see the dirt caking his paws and face, realizing that they'd likely clawed themselves out of their own grave. "It's good to have you back. You need anything?" he asked, the last part spoken with a tinge of concern. Fourth had come back from death a few times himself and it was always a jarring, surreal process. And Kydobi had been dead for a little while now, so if he needed water or a quiet place Fourth would handle it.

WELCOME TO THE NARCISISM,
WE'RE UNITED UNDER OUR INDIFFERENCE

"Fourthwall/neutral/Glitchhop"

♡♡♡
tags

[gael]

♛

Even as long as Gael lived, the red and black vulpine found some events to surprise him.  An immortal -- hardly invulnerable -- creature, the concept of rising from the grave immersed him in unease.

The return of someone he felt loyalty to however, a comrade in arms, offered a pleasant surprise.  Later, the golden-hazel eyes may dim, dark with the bitterness of a widow -- of a father who lost his son.  Later, when the faerie processed the surreal event.  In the moment, Gael felt inclined to scan the shadowed jaguar for signs of injury.

His head moved in a gentle incline towards Fourthwall's words, the promise of immediate assistance.  Aine will be happy.  The thought moved his lips upward.  The recent grief could be replaced by a much needed joy.

"I can send for Aine, my friend," he offered lightly, his thoughtful eyes blinking.  She grew a number of useful herbs in her garden, should the jaguar require strength or healing.  From the caked earth on the large feline, Gael imagined chamomile may be in order at the very least.

"ISN'T IT LOVELY?" —-- gael ó broin / faerie / pittian / lamby

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[Kydobi]

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NOTHING SWEET 'BOUT MY MISERY -
♕tags-powers♕

[OOC: ]

To say it was a relief to see Fourthwall would be an understatement. In fact the brute felt surprise more than anything. He had forgotten that their friend was... pregnant and in a much smaller form than what the jaguar was used to. Their eagerness also caught him by surprise, not expecting his fellow marauder to have missed him so much.

Truth be told, Kydobi expected Fourthwall to have been slaughtered. Although he was very happy to see them, he was still in shock and his face was slow as his movements.

Eyes would flicker to the floor when he noted the change of tone, worry. His focus switched to his mud caked paws, the dirtiest he had ever seen them. It would take long to clean it thoroughly.

The jaguar sighed, not saying anything. Moments to those outside but inside his mind he was stuck in a memory that felt like forever. The feeling of dying is what stuck the most, the darkness. That falling sensation, he couldn’t figure it out. But once he smashed painlessly into his... body...

He shook his head and furled his eyebrows at the ground. Death was a cold hotel room. He had no intentions of going back.

Then Gael would come and he would raise his head, where was Aine? She was okay? When the fox mentioned he relaxed. Allowing them to observe him.

He had no wounds, despite the serious damage done. He hadn’t been dead long enough for the wounds to have seal up into scars the way they had. But they were, across his face and eye and a terrible nasty looking amount on his throat. Even on his shoulders and thighs.

A reminder of his failure.

Kydobi swallowed a lump in his throat, realizing that all would see what was on his body. When Gael asked him for Aine he shook his head, with a scratchy dry throat he spoke, “no-no... she doesn’t need to see me all dirty. If she comes she comes...”

He swallowed again and tried to clear his throat, looking at Fourth he would softly ask for water. His voice cracked as he tried to fight back this urge to cower into a corner.

Everyone was staring.

[sub][W]isker[/sub]

[fulzanin]

decisions to decisions are made and not bought

There were few things that were concrete in the insects mind. Food was the ultimate priority, that was the most solidified concept. Food was what allowed him to live. He needed food to exist. He needed food for energy and energy meant life. There was many different reasons for why food was such a concrete, firm, and established notion in the dragon's mind. Food was what had driven the cicada to leave the territory in search of food elsewhere. It didn't drive him to leave the Pitt, no. It was where he had established his home - or, the vaguest concept of it that Astiar could comprehend. It was where he had emerged from the ground. It was where he had taken up residency in his earliest days. The dragonoid half of him was likely an additional factor to his mind being bound to this place. This place was as close to home that he could ever be able to understand. He hadn't ever been harmed here. One of his trips past the desert in search of food had led to a burnt front leg. It was healing up awkwardly, his dense black scales growing back over the burn in a jagged fashion.

The cicada didn't really know Kydobi's name. Despite the cicada knowing who he was, and developing a special way to address such, he didn't actually know the name. Astiar was a simplistic beast. Names weren't needed when bursts of chatter and clicking and scraping could somehow accomplish the same feat. A simplistic beast came from a simplistic mind. Shouting caught his attention. Not that it was the shout of the jaguar's name, just the fact that it was a shout in general. Huffs parted the cicada's maw as he raised himself up into a stand. The one true deep emotion he was ever able to convey - and even that was an incredibly loose statement - was curiosity. He liked to 'figure out' what was going on around him. When there had been ants crawling over his body, he had lifted his arm to observe and watch. When the raid had ensued, he'd just stood there and watched it all happen. The cicada was certainly an observer, and the dragon certainly was curious. Hearing the shout had arisen the deep curiosity that was tucked away in his simplistic mind. A buzzing of his wings sounded and he trotted after the few that had gone to approach Kydobi.

Did Astiar truly understand hat Kydobi had died? Not really. He hadn't seen the jaguar die. He hadn't seen the jaguar be buried. His mind was simplistic enough that, even if he had seen those events, there was a possibility that he would not have understood what was happening. His tail dragged behind him as the cicada got closer. The other looked different. Not different enough that it fully hindered Astiar establishing that this was Kydobi. He rumbled, clicking his mandibles afterwards. His head then lowered, wings buzzing a little. Where had the jaguar been? Astiar had not seen him in such an odd and lengthy amount of time. The brieftest notions of concern were allowed in his basic mind, antennae flickering in the air over his head. He chattered as if somehow he was conveying his curiosity, but he wasn't truly managing to make such evident. Still, the cicada was... as close to happy as he could get over Kydobi's return. His tail loosely wagged behind him, likely the result of seeing some other creature do it and was merely mimicking behavior. His mandibles clicked again, chattering, making more random noise as Astiar always had the habit of doing. The murmurs of NPC's that had brought Fourthwall over were quiet. The cicada took the idea of a silent return and broke it by making buzzes and clicking and all sorts of other noisy sounds, head remaining lowered all the while.

control yourself and take only what you need from it

TAGS 9/4/19:

GENERAL.
✧ Astiar | Asti, Ast, Bug
✧ physically medium, mentally easy | 7/30
✧ male | he/him
✧ unallianced
— wherever there is food, that is where Astiar will take up temporary residence. Notably most of his time is spent in the Pitt, but has distanced himself from the group due to the lack of food following the raid.

APPEARANCE.
✧ dragon (ref.) | health: 100% | cicada
— a nine foot seven inches tall cicada themed dragon. He has four antennae growing on his head from orange growths on his head. Two grow in front of his twisted horns, and two from behind. Dewclaws point backwards from the body-facing side of all six feet. He has mandibles on either side of his mouth that come from his upper jaw. The top of his upper jaw lays a hardened segment of scales, dotted with yellow dots. These extend as deep green freckles onto the face. A long stinger rests at the end of his lanky, segmented tail. His body has the segmented build of an insect, consisting of a deep orange head, brown body and abdomen, and black spine. His underbelly is a pale navy, with splotches of yellow showing the separation of the sections. His wings are tinted blue, but are translucent. The membrane for them is a bright, vibrant orange. Each wing has one claw at it's second bone, pointing down the rest of the wing's length from the body. His front paws have five fingers, while the rest of his limbs have only three toes. His red eyes are near unblinking, and are built like that of an insect. A series of jagged spikes rise from his black back, and run down his head to his neck.
— tongue and blood is yellow
— current injures: burnt front right leg, deep scratches in his front scales

COMMUNICAION.
✧ Soft Buzzing
— Ambient noise. Pleased. Feels like making noise. Stretching. Curious.
✧ Loud Buzzing
— Angry. Infuriated. Sizing up. Stop. About to strike. Flying.
— IF ALONE: 'Come here'. 'Come closer'. 'Help'. 'Need assistance'. Lonely
✧ Mandible Clicking
— Ambient noise. Hungry. Curious. Nervous.
✧ Hissing
— Angry. Irritated. About to strike. Stop. 'Stay away'. 'I'm uncomfortable'. Testing vocal cords.
✧ Chattering
— Ambient noise. Mimicking speech. Pleasant.
✧ Grumbling
— Irritated. Annoyed. Being pessimistic. Bothered.
✧ Roaring
Angered. Infuriated. Enraged. Sizing up. Stop. About to strike.
✧ Rumbling
— Curious. Intrigued. Friendly. 'Come closer'. Pleased. Happy.
✧ Screeching
— Submission. 'Stop'. 'Go away'. 'I yield'. Panic. Fear. Terror.

PERSONALITY.
✧ Curious, inquisitive, devoted, loyal, open-minded
✧ neutral sided, easily impressed, impressionable
✧ clueless, over-obedient, takes commands without hesitation

RELATIONSHIPS.
✧ adok x yitz
✧ clipyer
✧ demiromantic bisexual | single
✧ friends
— will add

INTERACTIONS.
✧ physically medium | mentally easy | no powers | no weapons | claws, teeth, talons
✧ will start/end fights on command, hard provoke | will kill
— notably this is for instances where Astiar must fight. If able, Astiar will never raise his claws against any other creature unless he has been directly ordered to do so
— commands must be one word. If any words follow the command, Astiar is unable to understand due to his limited intelligence. Heavy presence of emotion will equally tarnish his ability to follow commands.
✧ very limited fighting knowledge
✧ allowed to powerplay peaceful actions | attack in bolded #B21925 | mention [member=7712]Astiar[/member] when attacking

MISC.
— mostly feral
— speaks a wordless bug language
— worker drone
✧ Obeys without question as long as it is a simple command
— eats trees and other hard plant matter
— cannot understand speech

[aine.]

[table][tr][td]

AINE NÍ BROIN
PITTIAN / CROW
FAE DRUID
INFORMATION

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[div style="width: 360px; font-family: palatino; color: #2e8b57; text-align: left; padding-top: 15px; padding-left: 10px"]I'LL COME BACK WHEN YOU CALL ME

Grief.  The state of being became familiar early in her life without her entirely realizing it.  The loss of her mother and brother haunted her.  The flames.  The ash in the air, coating the grass like snow.  The little vixen knew a little something like grief.

Denial first and foremost.  Young and learning, Aine possessed little understanding of death.  When someone died, they were 'gone'.  Lost.  Missing.  Her attentive ears picked up other phrases over the moons; passed, moved on.  None of this truly sat well with her.  If someone was lost, they could be found.  Simple.

So the little druid never truly accepted someone's 'gone'-ness as permanent.  Yet everyone acted as it was.  Like... Defeat.  She didn't like the feeling of defeat and everyone acted so defeated about it.  When they buried Kydobi in the ground... Defeat.  She didn't get it.

It made her stomach twist in knots and her chest tighten.

He couldn't come back to them buried under the ground.  Didn't they know that?

Anger.  No, they didn't seem to because they did it anyway and his absence haunted her.  It was not right.  He was her friend and he was gone and she hated it.

'I can send for Aine-' The druid's ears perked.  The soot colored paws she dragged halted.  Alert.  A spark in listless hazel hues.  If her da was thinking of sending for her, it must be important to her.  "Da?" Her head turned.  And she faltered.

Her vision began to blur.  Chest squeezing.  Uncertain.  Furious -- she'd been right, hadn't she?  "Mist-mister Kydobi?"

She's crying then, stumbling over and about to press her face in the jaguar's chest when she thinks twice.  He didn't look entirely okay.  Instead she shuffles into her father, too sad-happy to think much of how she's probably soaking his fur with tears.  Her voice is muffled but fierce, "I-I knew it. I knew it."

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© MADI

[bubblegum]

[teef]

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[color=#7E354D]BAI SHI
" biting the burning bullet to break bones "

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he who was once dead had now risen from the grounds he was buried within, returned to the living despite his shock, fear and uncertainty. his scent, one they had thought gone forever drifted across their nose, blind eyes blinking is disbelief as they pushed out of the shelter of their den, listening to the others gathered around.

it can't be kydobi. he's dead ... they thought to themself, inhaling his faint yet muddy scent as they approached, tail flicking. they had been spending time in the parts of the territory that rarely saw anyone, reminiscing. but it was him, it most definitely was kydobi. hearing his name in the words of the others, the dragon traded their beastly body for their jaguar one, approaching slowly and sniffing the air the whole time.

"k-kydobi?" they asked shakily, unable to see him, yet doing their best to track him by scent. "is that you?" they questioned, moving until their nose told them he was right in front of them. "ky ... you came back ... ky ..." they could barely speak, emotion welling in their throat as they held back on nuzzling into his chest, licking his cheek instead.

[Kydobi]

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NOTHING SWEET 'BOUT MY MISERY -
♕tags-powers♕

[OOC: ]

The cicadas face brought more than just feelings of warmth and companionship. The dragon’s appearance also brought heavy memories, of the beginning of the ill-fated raid that had brought them all to defeat.

When he heard the familiar chatter and buzz his mind was snatched from the present and thrown into the past. His heart was pumping as he flexed his claws into the earth, if anyone was sensitive enough the would be able to feel the earth vibrate under there paws. He knew the battle was over and yet he couldn’t help it.  Couldn’t help but feel terror in knowing what would happen. These were memories left sitting in his head, he had died before they could be processed and accepted and so he was stuck with having to manage the overflow of them all at once.

In silent flashback, he would only be brought out of when he smelled her. Her as in them. Aine and Goldie. Who new two people who stirred such polar emotions within the jaguar could be within the same vicinity.

“Mist-mister Kydobi?”

The vision faded and his body relaxed, muscles no longer flexing and rippling with stress and bewilderment. She brought him back to reality and he would exhale looking at her softly. She cried she knew it in Gael’s fur and Kydobi frowned. To know he was the cause of such deep sorrow in a child so young was making him tear up.

He felt guilty and obligated to make it up to her, “i-I’m sorry Aine...” he would look away from her as he tried to come up with something else to say but he couldn’t. There was nothing to say.

Although in slight denial, everyone was confirming the very thing he wanted to be a lie. He had died. Or at least it seemed like it. Perhaps he was in a coma? Some deep stasis in which he appeared dead? But why hadn’t he suffocated in his grave, a quiet voice would ask. That he wasn’t sure.

A scarred face would look at Astiar and Kydobi would give a weak smile. Immediately eyes would look to the damaged lake and his gaze darkened. Who had done that? Who would hurt such a kind beast? Where was everyone else? Caught in a flurry of questions he would slowly growl, everyonce in a while he would see people. Aurum. Jervis. Idyll... people he blamed for this.


But I’m that crowd of enemies, Goldie’s face did not appear. But she did show up and she did stay back and for that he was grateful. He no longer hated her as viciously as before but he would not ever like her. Perhaps some cold respect. The very person he was trying to protect had proven Goldie right. At the expense of his life. There was a flicker of pain where the scimitar had not only dug deep but shocked him. He would look and see a jagged scar. So it seemed his body was a new, healed and healthier than ever.. but there still had to be reminders. He had no knowledge of the scars upon his face yet.

His gaze would shift to Goldie, eyes on her own. There was no expression whatsoever. “Where is Jervis?”, he would ask with a scratchy voice roughened by a low growl. Part of him hoped the brute was dead, that the vermin died painfully and slowly. The other half wished the opposite, he wanted to taste the fox’s blood in his maw for what they had done to him. He wanted to eat them, as brutal and savage that sounded... it was true. Kydobi had made a mistake with them and the Ardent had abused and exploited Kydobi’s loyalty till the very end. The fox had ruined the jaguars reputation among the other groups.

It was the answer to Kydobi’s “why the hell are we all here still”. Because they had no where else to go. Because they all were  here still. Familiarity and companionship. Because no one wanted to sacrifice that feeling for one of alienation. There was a stain on each and everyone of their names just because they were Pittian... no one would accept them like each other would. And so they stayed.

It was why Kydobi came back. This was his family. He loved them.

Even though he had been focused on something entirely else, it wouldn’t be for long. He sensed their arrival and he couldn’t help but stand up eagerly. His nose and ears heard them before his eyes saw them... but they would come for him no doubt.

He spotted them in his favorite form of theirs. The familiar vitiligo pelt brought more comfort than anyone. He chuffed softly, tail rippling with eagerness.

The Marauder watched them come closer and closer, he did not miss the way they did it. Had they gone completely blind? It didn’t matter, they were alive. He would raise his chin and straighten his posture when he anticipated a nuzzle. But he was met with a warm tongue on his face. He was disappointed, but he understood he was not clean. They would make up for it later though, he was sure.

The grave had been so cold. All he found here was warmth and he was ever grateful. Surrounded by people who cared for him as he did to them.

He looked at Goldie once more, perhaps asking her to come closer. He felt she wanted to say something and he couldn’t help but be curious as to what.

A welcome back? Or some bitter words.

[sub][W]isker[/sub]

[bubblegum]