I want to be gone, is all - Oneshot, open

[Ares]

As long as breath comes from my mouth,
I may yet stand the slightest chance.

God she was hurting. So, so badly was she hurting. It wasn't just her broken leg - it was the stress, the emotional distress, the memories. So many factors into her state of mind. There was just so much. She felt lost now. She wanted to run. Ares wanted to run away but where would she go? Even so, she was a threat to so many including herself and it hurt, god, it hurt. She couldn't go anywhere without risking the life of someone. So she was just stuck.

And she was angry - god she was furious. And just at herself - no one else. No one else was held in her anger but she held herself in iron grip. And anger just made it worse - the pain was so much worse. Burning feeling in her chest, fire in her blood. And to keep everyone safe she stayed outside of camp, gravitated toward the beach.

Limping, with a whimper every step, she approached the shore. This strange song graced her ears - something about a shaft of light and being covered in a void. It was oddly fitting for her, considering her circumstances. Oh, god, they must be hating her now. She wanted to say that it wasn't her, that she was sleeping and Goldenkit's plea had woken her but would they even believe her? Would he believe her?

It was that thought that broke her. Her entire body buckled and she fell into the sand, a sob escaping her. Pain dulled by her mind's agony and all she could do was mumble senselessly between sobs. She looked at the ocean, thinking she saw someone. Her mother? She extended her good paw. But she pulled it back as the vision faded. [color=red]"No... god no. Why can't I just live in peace? What did I do? Do I deserve this? Do I deserve to... to belikethis?" She choked on her words and suddenly she fell again, one last sentence leaving her before she went completely silent.

"I am a monster."

/// tl;dr - Ares, after losing control again, falls into a state of despair and mental distress. She heads to the beach where she suddenly collapses and falls into a sobbing mess. Thinking she see's her birth mother she tries to reach out but the vision disappears and Ares falls back into a moment of despair.

— Reggan