11-08-2020, 09:39 PM
[div style="width: 45%; text-align: justify; font-size: 12pt; letter-spacing: -1px; font-family: times new roman;"]♡ — Emotional exhaustion was a painful thing. Worse? Being a little lost, and not physically. Being lost in oneself, not knowing where she belonged if she belonged anywhere. In Palmclan, she had a friend group. But she had been physically distant from them ever since she nearly drowned. Avoiding the ocean was paramount now, she did not want a rerun of that. But when the group she made herself a part of had the ocean as part of its identity, then where was home? Where did she fit? Where did she belong? There was just so much troubled water in her mind. Nothing seemed solid or clear anymore.
Passing a fallen tree, she felt its branches stare at her. Meeting the gaze, she felt herself tremble again. She quickly left the tree and ended up at a small stream. Staring at the clear water, her reflection, she felt a rock drop in her heart. She looked.. ugly, in her unblinking eyes. Horrific, forever staring. The arrangement of scales and fur placed upon her face framed the ugliness in all its glory, golden eyes the only pretty thing there. Opening her jaws, she wanted to bite herself. Teeth that felt too large, too strange, too different. Ugly. She was just ugly.
[align=center][color=#0C7805]"Get a load of this monster,
She doesn't know how to communicate.
Her mind is in a different place,
Would everybody please give her a little bit of space.."
Passing a fallen tree, she felt its branches stare at her. Meeting the gaze, she felt herself tremble again. She quickly left the tree and ended up at a small stream. Staring at the clear water, her reflection, she felt a rock drop in her heart. She looked.. ugly, in her unblinking eyes. Horrific, forever staring. The arrangement of scales and fur placed upon her face framed the ugliness in all its glory, golden eyes the only pretty thing there. Opening her jaws, she wanted to bite herself. Teeth that felt too large, too strange, too different. Ugly. She was just ugly.
[align=center][color=#0C7805]"Get a load of this monster,
She doesn't know how to communicate.
Her mind is in a different place,
Would everybody please give her a little bit of space.."
Gentle the song she whispered, turning her face away from the reflection. What she would give to be normal, to be just a regular cat or even just a regular snake. If she could've just not been here, had let herself drown. But that was selfish. Her friends would have been hurt by that. So even if she wished to escape from this mental war, she mustered herself to stay alive. Her heart was cracked, no cast set for it. So as she walked away from the stream, she felt herself getting heavier and heavier with pain that wasn't there physically.
[color=#0C7805]"Speech"
" THEY NEVER HAD IT LIKE ME, LIKE ME / THEY NEVER REALLY LIKED ME, LIKED ME! " ————————————————— ˊˎ˗