what do i stand for | paola | most nights i dont know

[Seakit Roux.]

IF MY LIFE IS GOING

TO MEAN ANYTHING,

I HAVE TO LIVE IT

MYSELF.

tiguar . young . he/him
demigod of the deep

//brain said human au machine go brrr

These days, Deniz's life was in constant turmoil. In the span of a week, he got his brother back and lost him once again, rendering him the last child from his batch. Now it was just him and the little ones. Before he could cope or process, fate had thrown another knife into his heart like it was a sport. Sam, his own mother, was gone. He had to stand there and watch as her other mother broke and keep himself whole so he could care for his family. Every moment since then had been fake smiles and reassurances, carrying for his mourning family. Many nights were sleepless ones as he watched over his loved ones, terrified that he would loose  another if he slept.

Last night has been the first night he had properly slept, after his body truly gave up on him and knocked him out. For the first time since he lost Sam, he almost felt well rested. He needed some space to process and think, where he didn't have to plaster on a fake smile and pretend he was falling apart.

It was still early morning when he found himself on the beach, staring out across the crisp blue waters. He began slowly, simple stretches where the water mimiced his movements. While he was nowhere near a master, he had quickly speedrun gaining his skills after his very long excursion under the waters. His current motions her simple, filled with fluid sweeping motions with his hands as streams of water crossed back forth before him, tracing the paths his hands made.