03-31-2020, 08:04 PM
[font=trebuchet ms]Lethargy into restlessness and back again she slipped, day in and day out, energy rising and falling in inconvenient patterns. Mornings were spent lying in bed struggling to muster up the will to move; afternoons spent pacing, thoughts racing but never stopping in one place for long enough to reach a conclusion; nights spent awake, the patterns of the ceiling burning themselves into her retinas until she finally blacked out. Part of her wished something would change for the better, something to remind her that this wasn't just a perpetual cycle of futility.
The sound of glass shattering was the polar opposite of what she'd wanted.
Rin surged out of her room and bolted for the source of the noise, led on by the intermittent sobs and harsh impacts of something going horribly, horribly wrong. Destruction, precious objects breaking. Flames flickering in and out of the corners of her vision. Snarls of rage, wails of despair. Screams. She had to hold it together, but she could feel her grip on reality loosening with every loud disturbance of the peace.
Fury.
They'd never be proud of me.
She pushed herself to her limits, her muscles screeching in protest.
She is young, but capable. I love you all with all my heart. A screech, and a crash, and a descent into madness. I was never good enough. I'm sorry. I'm s- Trailing off into the distance, without closure. Despair, giving in. Nothing you do will ever bring them back. Dragged into oblivion, where she could never reach. I think you should just go. The scent of blood, smothering all, choking the life out of her.
Let go.
She finally saw Diya there in front of her, within the swirl of sensory overload, and the scene cleared to reveal reality. Diya, broken, sobbing, bleeding. Pushing through the wreckage, Rin struggled to pull herself back together. Blood poured from Diya's paws, leaving messages on the floor- messages of sorrow, of self-hatred. A last song of ruin.
The damage to her paws would heal, with treatment. "Someone bring me bandages," Rin called out, her voice hoarse and thick with grief. Again and again, her wounds reopened at the slightest touch. Worthless. I thought you could actually do it. Stumbling forward, she gently attempted to put a paw on Diya's shoulder. A clear reminder of what was real, in the midst of the darkness that plagued their minds- not entrapping, the way a hug might be interpreted, but a gesture of solidarity that Diya was free to refuse.
"I'm here," she whispered, lowering her head. "I'm here."
The sound of glass shattering was the polar opposite of what she'd wanted.
Rin surged out of her room and bolted for the source of the noise, led on by the intermittent sobs and harsh impacts of something going horribly, horribly wrong. Destruction, precious objects breaking. Flames flickering in and out of the corners of her vision. Snarls of rage, wails of despair. Screams. She had to hold it together, but she could feel her grip on reality loosening with every loud disturbance of the peace.
Fury.
They'd never be proud of me.
She pushed herself to her limits, her muscles screeching in protest.
She is young, but capable. I love you all with all my heart. A screech, and a crash, and a descent into madness. I was never good enough. I'm sorry. I'm s- Trailing off into the distance, without closure. Despair, giving in. Nothing you do will ever bring them back. Dragged into oblivion, where she could never reach. I think you should just go. The scent of blood, smothering all, choking the life out of her.
Let go.
She finally saw Diya there in front of her, within the swirl of sensory overload, and the scene cleared to reveal reality. Diya, broken, sobbing, bleeding. Pushing through the wreckage, Rin struggled to pull herself back together. Blood poured from Diya's paws, leaving messages on the floor- messages of sorrow, of self-hatred. A last song of ruin.
The damage to her paws would heal, with treatment. "Someone bring me bandages," Rin called out, her voice hoarse and thick with grief. Again and again, her wounds reopened at the slightest touch. Worthless. I thought you could actually do it. Stumbling forward, she gently attempted to put a paw on Diya's shoulder. A clear reminder of what was real, in the midst of the darkness that plagued their minds- not entrapping, the way a hug might be interpreted, but a gesture of solidarity that Diya was free to refuse.
"I'm here," she whispered, lowering her head. "I'm here."
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