In the spirit // open // of truth

[jacob w.c.]

It'd been a few days now since he'd come back from the Typhoon. He'd run some therapy but he decided he needed to do more than that. Jacob knew better than anyone that sometimes getting well wasn't just a matter of doing everything the books told you to do. Sometimes you needed something or someone else to push you forward and he thought this would help with that. If he could help foster a feeling of community or even just distract his clanmates for a little while. So, he'd made all sorts of pastries and some hot chocolate. Most of the pastries were his Ma's recipes, with peanut butter cookies and brownies and even a little cake. He'd also grabbed a few recipes from a few books he'd seen and the cannolis that Jersey had taught him how to make. This was a deserts only sort of party and Jacob could only hope that the sugar would help mask all the terrible things that'd been happening lately. He put them all on trays, carefully covering them with some so he could at least keep them warm. After that, he grabbed the next tray.

Even as he went about, he found his thoughts drifting to Typhoon. He still wasn't sure how to feel about what happened there. Of course, the first part of it had been terrible. Being forced to relive his worst memories wasn't ever pleasant, whether they were put there by some outside force or projected to him from his struggling mind. He'd once read somewhere that he only got those nightmares and things because his mind was trying to protect itself but he didn't understand that. How could that possibly be protection? All of that aside, the rest of his stay in the Typhoon had been relatively pleasant, aside from the recovery of what Guru had done to him. He'd stayed with Pincher and the man had looked after him. He'd seen him in an even worse condition than Jersey had ever seen him. He'd seen all his scars, he'd seen him panic over flames and figures that weren't there, he'd seen him cry through the night and go between eating as much as possible to eating nothing at all. For being a pirate, Jacob felt like Pincher understood him more than anyone he'd met in Snowbound, maybe even more than Jersey did. There was a part of him that wanted to go back to talk to him. Pincher didn't hold any expectations towards him. He didn't have to act happy or like everything was alright, he could just be honest. Jacob didn't think there'd been anyone like that since his Ma and the idea of being honest about his conditions and feelings was a welcome one. He knew he couldn't do that, though. He didn't want to be overbearing and rushing back to be with him would be a mistake, as much as he'd love to do it. Still, ever since then he hadn't been able to pull his mind away from the doberman. His only distraction was the sweets he made now.

Once all the pastries and hot chocolate was out in the tunnels, he went back to grab the many blankets from his den, most of which he'd made. He laid them out and let out a soft sigh. Now he just had to call everyone here. Still, it'd be nice to take a few quiet moments to himself, especially after making all of this. So, he made his way over to one of his favorite blankets, one with little knitted suns all over it, and laid down. He told himself he'd just relax for a moment and then he'd call everyone over. It wasn't a big deal. He wasn't that tired. The truth was, though, that he hadn't slept a full night in days and moments after laying down, he was fast asleep. The warm deserts and hot chocolate still stood out on their trays, clearly ready to be passed out to his clanmates, but Jacob was already too far into his nap to get up and offer anyone anything. The Husky eventually rolled over onto his side, using his paw to cover his eyes as he pressed his nose deeper into the blanket.

★ though the scars remain and tears will never dry, i'll bless my homeland til i die ━