I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU && visiting malphas.

[madster]

he turned, studying her. she had said she was fine with the pills, so he moved, uncapping a sharpie and using it to write - take one at night. in his terribly sloppy- but still legible handwriting. still in possession of the bottle, he lowered his eyelids. maybe he should ask merihem for some for himself, but that would mean having to see his brother more than he had to. unlike delilah, malphas' pain was not out of remorse or the feelings he felt towards somebody else. it was his own self-loathing. he knew he was useless. he blinked, tilting his head. "alright. take one at night. the thing about anti-depressants is that this might not be right dosage, or even the right medication. let me know how it's working for you. it's a journey that you and i are both on," he chuckled, then listening to her.

the candlelight lit her pink face as she spoke, and he listened carefully. she wanted to be a doctor. malphas knew how it felt- he was motivated by somebody, somebody who was long gone, somebody who'd never see that he was a medic now. delilah complimented him on his medical abilities, noting his age. "yeah. somebody has to be reliable here." he tensed up, then continued. "listen. do what you want to do. life is so fucking short you wouldn't believe it. hell, i can't guarantee a promotion or anything cause' i'm not in cahoots with morgan, but i'll teach you some stuff if you want. it's not hard to learn. the toughest part is learning to let go."

he paused again, thinking. "you have to let go of your previous life. you get reduced to the medical man. nobody knows you outside of your medical skills. you become your job. and it's stressful. i don't even have anyone to confide to, since abathur and mira aren't around that often. if you've seen what this job does to me and still want to do something like this... by all means, i think you've got what it takes," he joked. "sorry for rambling. i've got a killer headache from booze withdrawal." he slid her the pill bottle, red eyes dull.