05-23-2018, 07:40 PM
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[shadow=darkblue,right]KILLUA[/shadow]
.
(guessssssssss who's late with this!!)
Taking care of others wasn't something that Killua was good at. And it wasn't probably anything that he would be good at either. He didn't have enough experience when it came to taking care of others in the first place. He always had the mentality that everyone should be capable of taking care of themselves to a certain degree instead of having someone babysit them all of the time. It was especially annoying when he was one of the most power animals that did live in Snowbound. Killua remembered when he wouldn't even try to help those that were in trouble and would watch as they started to bleed out onto the border. But this had been when he was still with his family. He didn't have any morals because any sort of moral he thought of for himself would just hinder the job at hand. Something he couldn't afford to happen. The assassin needed to just have one thing on his mind and that was to become strong enough to that he could become the family heir without there actually being any sort of issue. Killua had that thought in mind because in the beginning he really did enjoy being an assassin. he got stronger, and he could use that strength in order to elicit fear in those that came across him. It was entertaining. But like a toy that was played with too much, it got old far too quickly for him. He wanted something else, and he wanted something better. The torture sessions that he was going through were practically boring to him, up to the point where he could even fall asleep if he tried hard enough as he wouldn't feel all that much pain in the first place. The wildcat grew even bored with the aspect of clans when he was stationed in them for a good amount of time. He found every action that a clanner did to be extremely frustrating. He would always complain the way that they ran things, and in most instances he was right about what he said. Of course he was. He was looking at everything like a logical standpoint, and like that of an assassin. He wasn't about to let anything get past him either, as it meant that he could easily be killed if he wasn't careful. Despite how tough he considered himself to be, Killua was actually incredibly fragile being a smaller wildcat species compared to the massive creatures that others could end up becoming. Which is why he had no choice but to be stronger than those that tried to go up against him in a fight. Since he had left his family, he had become a lot more merciful and even a bit more patient with those that he interacted with. He kinda had to, and he found that his patience was usually rewarded as no one really liked someone getting in their face and yelling at them either. However, his bluntness didn't go away when he was laying down reality to those that joined the clans. This was no safe haven. This was no paradise. Clans were always riddled with issues. They were constantly violent with one another and there was no changing that. When a group of creatures lived next to another group, there were bound to be territorial disputes. It was in their instincts, and those that didn't want to fight were bound to be picked on because they were innocent.
The assassin could easily play the innocent card thanks to his age and act completely defenseless and kind. It had been part of his job to fool others into thinking that he was something that he wasn't. He still did that to this day, when he was in a terrible mood he would still give off a grin to make sure that someone wouldn't be scared of him when he got pissed off. Social interaction almost felt like a chore with certain creatures, except London of course because the clouded leopard never seemed to be boring. Her thoughts always interested him, as they were strange and something that he had never encountered before. Being around those that acted differently from the usual stereotypes that he had come to known was certainly a treat for Killua. Killua raised a nonexistent eyebrow at the tiger when the other mentioned that he was going to put in a door. How the hell was that even going to end up working? Especially if the other intended to use a precious type of wood that Killua knew about. Of course, he did there were different type of wooden tables and areas in the mansion that he grew up in. His family was rich after all and were able to purchase basically whatever they wanted. "A door? What are you going to do just figure out how to drill holes into the way so you can make hinges? Or are you just going to wedge a piece of wood at the entrance of the cave and hope that works?" Killua stated with the smirk on his face as he messed with the tiger even more. That method certain would be entertaining, but the albino serval could always just knock the door down completely so he could make a dramatic entrance. At the mention that he already had the means to stay warm and that there shouldn't be any need for improvement. Killua seemed to be lost for what the other was saying until he looked around and noticed that there was obviously room for more than one animal to live in this cave. Wait. Wasn't there that Steve guy? His eyes moved from where Stark probably had been sleeping back to the tiger himself. Oh. No thanks. "Okay okay forget I asked sheesh." Killua would let out an airy huff from his jaws as he didn't want to get into the aspects of Starks love life. That just seemed weird, especially for an older guy. It seemed rather childish for him to react in such a way, but there were still parts of him that were a child. The Zoldyck's sapphire blue eyes were trained on the larger wildcat as he waited for the other's reaction to what he asked. It was fairly easy for him to read body language, and Stark wasn't that great when it came to hiding it either. It was basically in his personality to be fairly readable, at least in Killua's experience being around the former leader. Killua had looked up when silence had broken between them just so that he could see Stark's reaction instead of looking down at the ground like he had been originally. When the other gave him a one-word answer, and the answer he wasn't expecting to get, Killua visibly flinched for the first time in a long time.
Out of the simple factor that the entire ordeal was a shock to him and not something that he really regarded as painful. Killua kept his jaws shut as he watched as the tiger moved into a standing position, and he had to fight his instincts to standup as well. Why was he suddenly afraid of Stark standing up? That didn't make any sort of sense in his mind, but then again, he wasn't the only in his mind. He let the other finish what he was saying so that he could absorb everything that the other was saying. Killua didn't realize his body had started shaking at Stark's confession, and his head started to throb as the whispers started to grow in volume. He's lying. You know you only have one family. He doesn't know what you are.. Illumi's voice rang out in his head, and he felt himself start to hold his breath. His throat was clenching up, and it was true that Stark didn't know what he was. He shouldn't have to be pushed into the situation that his family was bringing toward him, but at the same time he had already confessed to London what he was and she was the only one that understood him. His large white ears pinned against his skull as he opened his mouth to speak, but then closed his mouth again. Trying so desperately to try to find the right words. A pained look spread across his facial features. He hated feeling this much. He was never supposed to feel anything. And all the strange emotions that were bouncing around in his skull was causing him nothing more but confusion and frustration. "I'm... not that." Killua said through clenched teeth, speaking in almost a choked manner. Killua was no longer looking at the tiger, his metal claws having unsheathed themselves and scratching the rock flooring underneath him. "You don't know what I've done. How dangerous I am." This was when the words started to spill out, and his head snapped up to look at Stark, having moved into a standing position himself. "I've killed thousands. I'm worse than any anti-clanner that's out there! Even Circusclown saw me take the lives of others before he died! I'm not good! I'm dangerous. Anyone that becomes associated with me gets hurts. If my family knows that you're connected to me in some way, they'll come after you. I can't protect you! Not from him." Killua's voice was shaking, and he seemed to be close to the point of shattering, his voice raising to pitches that he was yelling. He had gestured with his left paw and pointed his metal claws toward his chest when he talked about what he was. An assassin. One that was trained to kill and nothing else. He was trying to be better, and he truly was, but it was so difficult for him. Killua didn't mention who he was specifically talking to, knowing that Stark knew that it had been his own brother that had nearly killed him that day. He still had the scars that were hidden underneath his thick fur. It was obvious that the apprentice wasn't proud of the things he's done, but he also didn't mention that it hadn't been something that he wanted before. There was no redemption for him in the clans.
Taking care of others wasn't something that Killua was good at. And it wasn't probably anything that he would be good at either. He didn't have enough experience when it came to taking care of others in the first place. He always had the mentality that everyone should be capable of taking care of themselves to a certain degree instead of having someone babysit them all of the time. It was especially annoying when he was one of the most power animals that did live in Snowbound. Killua remembered when he wouldn't even try to help those that were in trouble and would watch as they started to bleed out onto the border. But this had been when he was still with his family. He didn't have any morals because any sort of moral he thought of for himself would just hinder the job at hand. Something he couldn't afford to happen. The assassin needed to just have one thing on his mind and that was to become strong enough to that he could become the family heir without there actually being any sort of issue. Killua had that thought in mind because in the beginning he really did enjoy being an assassin. he got stronger, and he could use that strength in order to elicit fear in those that came across him. It was entertaining. But like a toy that was played with too much, it got old far too quickly for him. He wanted something else, and he wanted something better. The torture sessions that he was going through were practically boring to him, up to the point where he could even fall asleep if he tried hard enough as he wouldn't feel all that much pain in the first place. The wildcat grew even bored with the aspect of clans when he was stationed in them for a good amount of time. He found every action that a clanner did to be extremely frustrating. He would always complain the way that they ran things, and in most instances he was right about what he said. Of course he was. He was looking at everything like a logical standpoint, and like that of an assassin. He wasn't about to let anything get past him either, as it meant that he could easily be killed if he wasn't careful. Despite how tough he considered himself to be, Killua was actually incredibly fragile being a smaller wildcat species compared to the massive creatures that others could end up becoming. Which is why he had no choice but to be stronger than those that tried to go up against him in a fight. Since he had left his family, he had become a lot more merciful and even a bit more patient with those that he interacted with. He kinda had to, and he found that his patience was usually rewarded as no one really liked someone getting in their face and yelling at them either. However, his bluntness didn't go away when he was laying down reality to those that joined the clans. This was no safe haven. This was no paradise. Clans were always riddled with issues. They were constantly violent with one another and there was no changing that. When a group of creatures lived next to another group, there were bound to be territorial disputes. It was in their instincts, and those that didn't want to fight were bound to be picked on because they were innocent.
The assassin could easily play the innocent card thanks to his age and act completely defenseless and kind. It had been part of his job to fool others into thinking that he was something that he wasn't. He still did that to this day, when he was in a terrible mood he would still give off a grin to make sure that someone wouldn't be scared of him when he got pissed off. Social interaction almost felt like a chore with certain creatures, except London of course because the clouded leopard never seemed to be boring. Her thoughts always interested him, as they were strange and something that he had never encountered before. Being around those that acted differently from the usual stereotypes that he had come to known was certainly a treat for Killua. Killua raised a nonexistent eyebrow at the tiger when the other mentioned that he was going to put in a door. How the hell was that even going to end up working? Especially if the other intended to use a precious type of wood that Killua knew about. Of course, he did there were different type of wooden tables and areas in the mansion that he grew up in. His family was rich after all and were able to purchase basically whatever they wanted. "A door? What are you going to do just figure out how to drill holes into the way so you can make hinges? Or are you just going to wedge a piece of wood at the entrance of the cave and hope that works?" Killua stated with the smirk on his face as he messed with the tiger even more. That method certain would be entertaining, but the albino serval could always just knock the door down completely so he could make a dramatic entrance. At the mention that he already had the means to stay warm and that there shouldn't be any need for improvement. Killua seemed to be lost for what the other was saying until he looked around and noticed that there was obviously room for more than one animal to live in this cave. Wait. Wasn't there that Steve guy? His eyes moved from where Stark probably had been sleeping back to the tiger himself. Oh. No thanks. "Okay okay forget I asked sheesh." Killua would let out an airy huff from his jaws as he didn't want to get into the aspects of Starks love life. That just seemed weird, especially for an older guy. It seemed rather childish for him to react in such a way, but there were still parts of him that were a child. The Zoldyck's sapphire blue eyes were trained on the larger wildcat as he waited for the other's reaction to what he asked. It was fairly easy for him to read body language, and Stark wasn't that great when it came to hiding it either. It was basically in his personality to be fairly readable, at least in Killua's experience being around the former leader. Killua had looked up when silence had broken between them just so that he could see Stark's reaction instead of looking down at the ground like he had been originally. When the other gave him a one-word answer, and the answer he wasn't expecting to get, Killua visibly flinched for the first time in a long time.
Out of the simple factor that the entire ordeal was a shock to him and not something that he really regarded as painful. Killua kept his jaws shut as he watched as the tiger moved into a standing position, and he had to fight his instincts to standup as well. Why was he suddenly afraid of Stark standing up? That didn't make any sort of sense in his mind, but then again, he wasn't the only in his mind. He let the other finish what he was saying so that he could absorb everything that the other was saying. Killua didn't realize his body had started shaking at Stark's confession, and his head started to throb as the whispers started to grow in volume. He's lying. You know you only have one family. He doesn't know what you are.. Illumi's voice rang out in his head, and he felt himself start to hold his breath. His throat was clenching up, and it was true that Stark didn't know what he was. He shouldn't have to be pushed into the situation that his family was bringing toward him, but at the same time he had already confessed to London what he was and she was the only one that understood him. His large white ears pinned against his skull as he opened his mouth to speak, but then closed his mouth again. Trying so desperately to try to find the right words. A pained look spread across his facial features. He hated feeling this much. He was never supposed to feel anything. And all the strange emotions that were bouncing around in his skull was causing him nothing more but confusion and frustration. "I'm... not that." Killua said through clenched teeth, speaking in almost a choked manner. Killua was no longer looking at the tiger, his metal claws having unsheathed themselves and scratching the rock flooring underneath him. "You don't know what I've done. How dangerous I am." This was when the words started to spill out, and his head snapped up to look at Stark, having moved into a standing position himself. "I've killed thousands. I'm worse than any anti-clanner that's out there! Even Circusclown saw me take the lives of others before he died! I'm not good! I'm dangerous. Anyone that becomes associated with me gets hurts. If my family knows that you're connected to me in some way, they'll come after you. I can't protect you! Not from him." Killua's voice was shaking, and he seemed to be close to the point of shattering, his voice raising to pitches that he was yelling. He had gestured with his left paw and pointed his metal claws toward his chest when he talked about what he was. An assassin. One that was trained to kill and nothing else. He was trying to be better, and he truly was, but it was so difficult for him. Killua didn't mention who he was specifically talking to, knowing that Stark knew that it had been his own brother that had nearly killed him that day. He still had the scars that were hidden underneath his thick fur. It was obvious that the apprentice wasn't proud of the things he's done, but he also didn't mention that it hadn't been something that he wanted before. There was no redemption for him in the clans.
snowbound -- snowstriker -- male -- 8 moons
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Tags | Updated 03/26/17:
ASSASSINATION THE FAMILY TRADE
WE ALL TAKE IT UP
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albino serval | extreme difficulty | BIO