05-03-2018, 09:59 PM
//idk i wasn't sure what to do with this so i just made it a oneshot ooPS
u can reply if u want!! (also spoilers for fma ofc)
For someone who had witnessed his own murder and came back with the memories of it, Hughes was surprisingly well-kept. Or at least, that's what he thought.
The fact that he wasn't having a mental break-down was enough evidence to show that he was doing well. He didn't sleep much anymore, sure, and his thoughts were always tormenting him, but that was to be expected. Aside from picturing his death and how he could have prevented it, he also thought a lot about how he could have done so much more, and that maybe if he had actually tried harder, maybe the homunculi could have been defeated and Roy wouldn't have been dead, too. If he had just gotten there in time, and had gotten through to the Colonel on the phone, it all could have ended so much better.
Even if he had still died, he would have died knowing he had helped the cause. But instead he was caught blind-sided, frozen by the face of his wife behind the barrel of the gun. That had probably been the worst part, even if he now knew that it wasn't actually her. He had known from the start, and yet it still tore him apart, knowing that that was the last thing he saw before he died. It was a image that was forever engraved into his brain. As if it wasn't enough that he had to leave her and his daughter behind.
He still wasn't sure how or why he had come back from the dead, nor why he was now in a canine's body. It was something he had asked himself time and time again. Of course, he never got an answer. When it came to his feelings on the matter, though, they were quite mixed.
Maes had always been the type of man to view life as a blessing, a thing to not be wasted--especially after the Ishbal war. It was something that only lasted so long, and you only got one chance. After that, it was nothing more. But his views on that had naturally changed. He couldn't help wondering if this was what the afterlife was truly like, something akin to a hellscape where you were tortured with your memories and the knowledge you left all your grieving family members behind. Or maybe it wasn't an afterlife. Maybe he truly was alive again. Sometimes he questioned it, even when he could feel his own pulse, could see the life inside himself.
A second chance? Really, it was hard to look at it as anything but that. He didn't think he was worthy of one, though. He had had a fulfilling life. He hadn't been able to watch his daughter grow up, sure, but the rest of his life had been like a dream. It was what every man would want--a loving wife, a beautiful daughter, a nice job and good friends. Who could ask for more? Yet it all was cut short because he knew too much. It was an unfair ending to a good story.
Yet he still ended up here, in a new environment and a whole new body.
Often times, he wondered what things were like back home. Sometimes he could only think the worst, like his family being hunted down and slaughtered by the homunculi, or Bradley destroying all of Amestris with his plans. His mind often ran rampant with these scenarios, often at night when he was desperately trying to sleep.
Overall, despite how hard he tried, he couldn't see his rebirth in any positive light. It felt like more of a curse than anything. It would have been different had he come back in his own body, in his own city. But he didn't, and now he was trapped here, forever wondering what was going on in another world.
Usually the lab didn't allow his inner turmoil to show on his face, but he couldn't hold it back much longer, not when he was so damn tired. His eyes drooped, and he nearly fell over where he sat, watching as the sun rose up to the middle of the sky. Even if he did sleep, his nightmares would probably cause him to wake up feeling restless and even worse than before.
"SPEECH"
u can reply if u want!! (also spoilers for fma ofc)
For someone who had witnessed his own murder and came back with the memories of it, Hughes was surprisingly well-kept. Or at least, that's what he thought.
The fact that he wasn't having a mental break-down was enough evidence to show that he was doing well. He didn't sleep much anymore, sure, and his thoughts were always tormenting him, but that was to be expected. Aside from picturing his death and how he could have prevented it, he also thought a lot about how he could have done so much more, and that maybe if he had actually tried harder, maybe the homunculi could have been defeated and Roy wouldn't have been dead, too. If he had just gotten there in time, and had gotten through to the Colonel on the phone, it all could have ended so much better.
Even if he had still died, he would have died knowing he had helped the cause. But instead he was caught blind-sided, frozen by the face of his wife behind the barrel of the gun. That had probably been the worst part, even if he now knew that it wasn't actually her. He had known from the start, and yet it still tore him apart, knowing that that was the last thing he saw before he died. It was a image that was forever engraved into his brain. As if it wasn't enough that he had to leave her and his daughter behind.
He still wasn't sure how or why he had come back from the dead, nor why he was now in a canine's body. It was something he had asked himself time and time again. Of course, he never got an answer. When it came to his feelings on the matter, though, they were quite mixed.
Maes had always been the type of man to view life as a blessing, a thing to not be wasted--especially after the Ishbal war. It was something that only lasted so long, and you only got one chance. After that, it was nothing more. But his views on that had naturally changed. He couldn't help wondering if this was what the afterlife was truly like, something akin to a hellscape where you were tortured with your memories and the knowledge you left all your grieving family members behind. Or maybe it wasn't an afterlife. Maybe he truly was alive again. Sometimes he questioned it, even when he could feel his own pulse, could see the life inside himself.
A second chance? Really, it was hard to look at it as anything but that. He didn't think he was worthy of one, though. He had had a fulfilling life. He hadn't been able to watch his daughter grow up, sure, but the rest of his life had been like a dream. It was what every man would want--a loving wife, a beautiful daughter, a nice job and good friends. Who could ask for more? Yet it all was cut short because he knew too much. It was an unfair ending to a good story.
Yet he still ended up here, in a new environment and a whole new body.
Often times, he wondered what things were like back home. Sometimes he could only think the worst, like his family being hunted down and slaughtered by the homunculi, or Bradley destroying all of Amestris with his plans. His mind often ran rampant with these scenarios, often at night when he was desperately trying to sleep.
Overall, despite how hard he tried, he couldn't see his rebirth in any positive light. It felt like more of a curse than anything. It would have been different had he come back in his own body, in his own city. But he didn't, and now he was trapped here, forever wondering what was going on in another world.
Usually the lab didn't allow his inner turmoil to show on his face, but he couldn't hold it back much longer, not when he was so damn tired. His eyes drooped, and he nearly fell over where he sat, watching as the sun rose up to the middle of the sky. Even if he did sleep, his nightmares would probably cause him to wake up feeling restless and even worse than before.
"SPEECH"