paranoid in every paragraph -- explanation

[lavi s.]

By the Force.  The young Jedi had seen conflict and betrayal, but it never grew easier.  It certainly felt less simple with Tena involved.  Lavi felt his muscles tense as the air shifted around the fiery sand cat.  This really hurt her.  Worse, he knew more to it than Tena was saying -- more than he expected her to say in the here and now.

"Te," he murmured, wariness in his very bones.  He had learned long ago that if one thing bothered Tena, it was anyone feeling responsible for her wellbeing.  She was too independent, too possessive of the freedom she had barely grasped, to ever accept it without a fierce fight.

With a heavy sigh, Lavi squared his shoulders.  Slowly, he turned his chocolate gaze onto Rin, still uncertain of the new Magna.  "We all made that oath, Rin.  Or did you forget?  And I know you probably don't want to hear this, but how about the end of that oath?  'To never forget yourself and your well-being'?"

"Te's right.  You don't know us.  You don't know what we've seen, what we've been through, what we've fought against before.  But it isn't really about if we're capable of protecting ourselves, Rin.  It's about you deciding we don't even get to know.  It's about you forgetting that Elysium is a community -- we're in this together."

"I know what it's like to lose everything.  Everyone." His friends, his master -- Lavi breathed in deeply.  "I know."  He even knew death.  Lavi would be lying if he said the memory didn't scare him.

"But it does not, and will never mean, I get to decide what's best for someone else's safety without a single word to them because I'm scared of losing them.  That is not my right, and it is not yours either." She reminded him of Lessa, in a way.  So fiercely believing she had to protect everyone like it was somehow her sole responsibility and stars when something bad happened, when she 'failed'...  "It's not fair to yourself, and it's not fair to us."

"We all swore to protect each other.  Let us, for stars sake.  You are not the sole guardian of all of Elysium."