GABE'S NOTES STORAGE

[GABRIEL]

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PENDEJO / THAT SHIT

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If there was a sudden drought and everything died, I would eat him. Okay, maybe not because he's so damn bony, but I'd be tempted to. Might start fattening him up just in case though, and if that never happens, it can't hurt. I'll have to get sneaky with the food. Don't think he'd accept anything from me outright, and yeah, I don't blame him. Can he eat sweets? I'll just leave jars of dulce de leche with sopapillas where he sleeps. Have to remember Mami's recipe.

Heard about the bear incident. Something to keep in mind. Wish I was there to see his face, though. After the log, I need to plan some kind of revenge. I'll leave a dead snake under his head. Wait- no, fuck's sake. Stupid bird brain. Wait. Would he think owl pellets are gross? He'd better because they're disgusting, but maybe he's like Elon.

If I get in a scrape, I can probably depend on him. Maybe. As a last resort. Still think those try-outs could've been timed. How fast can he run? I should find out. Might give me more revenge ideas, and I could even involve Laz. That'd be fun.

I didn't think it was possible for someone to infuriate me so much by just existing. He's a mosquito. A huge mosquito, but I'll just find a bigger swatter.

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