07-18-2018, 11:35 PM
[align=center][div style="borderwidth=0px; width: 55%; line-height:115%; text-align: justify;font-family: calibri;"]Home was never an easy subject when it came to Gabriel. He never had a home, from the moment he was a child onward. The wilderness was where he had lived the entirety of his life, chased from one place to another and only able to hope for rest for a day at most wherever he had decided to lay his head down. The closest thing to a home he had ever gotten was the gang, and even that was marred with it's history and memories. Back then, home had been whatever hole he had managed to drag himself into after being either used for their pleasures or used to fight, but at least he had a designated family. A designated group who, although hated him, allowed him to linger because of his worth.
The past still tasted bitter on his tongue, had for years now, but there was no use lamenting over it anymore. What was done for was done, and a home was not something he expected, not something he sought. He lived for the moment, let any place he lay his head down to rest to become a temporary shelter, because home just didn't mean the same thing to him anymore as it once did.
Home was the rage that had slowly festered inside of him. Home was the constant need to rip something apart lest he do it to himself. Home was a feeling, not a place, and it had been with him for three long years until he couldn't consider anything else even remotely similar. As a result, it had taken him two long days to even consider the possibility of setting up something akin to a shelter here, and he had yet to even take the inhabitants of this place up on their offer. It didn't feel right, to have some place to stay that actually felt like a house. So he wandered, and had rested wherever his paws decided to give out, for sleep would not come to him anyways and it was a waste of a bed as far as Gabriel was concerned.
Someone else needed a house more than he did. What he needed was to finally dig himself a grave and die.
He had seen many come back from Haven island, shaken and beaten down by what Gabriel was already used to. He fought off the demons in his head on more than one occasion, and it was that which had so far stopped him from participating in the activity himself. He wasn't a coward by all means, but some things were too much to do from the get go, when he could barely even get a hold of himself and find himself a house. They had promised that it wasn't a big deal if he didn't do it, that they wouldn't think any lesser of him if the process was too much...
But he figured he deserved what would come at him on that island to begin with.
It was with all these thoughts that Gabriel was wandering that evening, taking a leisurely stroll down the beach and seemingly unphased despite the turmoil inside of his head. After years, you grow used to it all, learn how to put up a mask that betrayed nothing more than you wanted it to, and he had become a master at it. It was what prompted an idle smile to cross his features as he noticed Marcellus, doing what appeared to be fishing but not quite succeeding at it, if his curses were anything to go by.
"Everything alright over there?" his voice wasn't his own, duel-toned and echoing through the air, wisps of smoke briefly escaping his maw to filter and dissipate into the air around him. Not even that broke him, the smile plastered onto his features, appearing genuine despite it being just as fake as his passive nature was. He looked as if it was normal, as if there was nothing wrong with the fact that he both sounded and looked like a monster, that he was wandering aimlessly about waiting for death to finally take him. But that, like everything else, was not for anyone else to know. Least of all Marcellus, who Gabriel knew next to nothing about save for a name.
The past still tasted bitter on his tongue, had for years now, but there was no use lamenting over it anymore. What was done for was done, and a home was not something he expected, not something he sought. He lived for the moment, let any place he lay his head down to rest to become a temporary shelter, because home just didn't mean the same thing to him anymore as it once did.
Home was the rage that had slowly festered inside of him. Home was the constant need to rip something apart lest he do it to himself. Home was a feeling, not a place, and it had been with him for three long years until he couldn't consider anything else even remotely similar. As a result, it had taken him two long days to even consider the possibility of setting up something akin to a shelter here, and he had yet to even take the inhabitants of this place up on their offer. It didn't feel right, to have some place to stay that actually felt like a house. So he wandered, and had rested wherever his paws decided to give out, for sleep would not come to him anyways and it was a waste of a bed as far as Gabriel was concerned.
Someone else needed a house more than he did. What he needed was to finally dig himself a grave and die.
He had seen many come back from Haven island, shaken and beaten down by what Gabriel was already used to. He fought off the demons in his head on more than one occasion, and it was that which had so far stopped him from participating in the activity himself. He wasn't a coward by all means, but some things were too much to do from the get go, when he could barely even get a hold of himself and find himself a house. They had promised that it wasn't a big deal if he didn't do it, that they wouldn't think any lesser of him if the process was too much...
But he figured he deserved what would come at him on that island to begin with.
It was with all these thoughts that Gabriel was wandering that evening, taking a leisurely stroll down the beach and seemingly unphased despite the turmoil inside of his head. After years, you grow used to it all, learn how to put up a mask that betrayed nothing more than you wanted it to, and he had become a master at it. It was what prompted an idle smile to cross his features as he noticed Marcellus, doing what appeared to be fishing but not quite succeeding at it, if his curses were anything to go by.
"Everything alright over there?" his voice wasn't his own, duel-toned and echoing through the air, wisps of smoke briefly escaping his maw to filter and dissipate into the air around him. Not even that broke him, the smile plastered onto his features, appearing genuine despite it being just as fake as his passive nature was. He looked as if it was normal, as if there was nothing wrong with the fact that he both sounded and looked like a monster, that he was wandering aimlessly about waiting for death to finally take him. But that, like everything else, was not for anyone else to know. Least of all Marcellus, who Gabriel knew next to nothing about save for a name.
♔ — I want brimstone in my garden