AND HE SANG ABOUT WHAT I'D BECOME ; private

[Ilijas]

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Ilijas, though desperate for friendship (and on a deeper level, companionship), had reservations of his own about getting close to others. He was not here on a job nor did he have any intention to steal the souls of his clanmates- he was simply afraid of opening himself up and permitting anyone to see perhaps the vulnerable, frightened child that hid behind his polite smiles and eloquent disposition. He had this innate knowledge that he had allowed a single person in before his memory had been claimed and that that process had been one laced with anguish. He was not meant to be known by anyone save his family. It was too complicated if anything but that was the case.

And yet here he was, gazing idly at someone whom he wished to be friends with. How strange. How new. How absolutely foreign. Amnesiac or not, he still realized how almost uncharacteristic this desire of his was and it admittedly succeeded in making him rather uncomfortable. The more people somebody loved, the weaker they were. He could love no one save his family and, because they were nonexistent in his life, he could love nobody but himself. It was how things had to be. His face hardened at the thought. He didn't want that. He didn't want to be alone. He craved the presence of others just as fire craved oxygen or a flower craved sunlight. This fate Ilijas was writing for himself would only make him unhappy.

He didn't want unhappiness, not in this life riddled with so many inexplicable mysteries.

[b][color=gray]"Not exactly," Came the bengal's quiet response to her first inquiry, [color=gray]"Sometimes reality isn't as sweet as that." He wasn't saying that nobody helped anyone but... it was not something everyone committed to doing. Especially not him anyways. Family above all, always and forever. He didn't even know his family and yet he was blindly loyal to them. [color=gray]"But regardless, the other clans sound fascinating. Perhaps I'll take a visit to each of them simply for a change in scenery," He continued, almost to himself. Tanglewood was obviously the name of their enemy but despite that, he still wished to travel there and witness their savagery for himself. Perhaps one of his family members lurked within their dangerous swamp. Who knew.

[color=gray]"Good," Came Ilijas' quick response upon being told that she read some parts of him like a book. She couldn't do that. He wouldn't let her. [color=gray]"While it's been a lovely experience talking to you thus far, I unfortunately have no interest in revealing my innermost self to you. Remaining in the shadows of mystery both soothes and amuses me. It's best that you know as little as possible," He explained nonchalantly, though there was no denying the distinct edge to his words. Curse Beatrice, he thought to himself, Why would she say something like that?

At least she proceeded with something more general and in relation to a statement about himself that had already been made. He couldn't stand to dwell on the topic of himself being somewhat an open book any longer. [color=gray]"Perhaps I had been a human, perhaps I had not. It's hard to say when you have hardly anything to base your life on. As for death, well I suppose it's inevitable. I'm a bit perplexed as to how I'm standing before you if that statement is true, admittedly, but I'm far too confused as it is to ponder that mystery right now."

He paused, contemplating her suggestion for a brief moment before casually shrugging. [color=gray]"I suppose that it wouldn't cause any harm, but I feel as if I'd recognize a family member despite it all were I to come across one. So far, I have yet to encounter anyone within the Typhoon that's caused me to believe that we might be related."

Except for Lilyspoise and that member of the Ascendants... that feeling was so, so incredibly strange. I'd write it off as pure coincidence if it hadn't been for that little tug. I suppose some further investigation is in order, if anything.