06-09-2024, 01:18 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-09-2024, 01:23 PM by XANTI. Edited 1 time in total.)
the hardest thing to me is facing the fear i live
no one can help me now, it’s under my heart!
Xanti’s right ear twitched. Xe supposed Kole should feel ashamed of himself, but xe didn’t much care for seeing the coyote’s weakness flashed in front of xem. What good was shame when it was so boring to witness? And, even worse, useless.
Hence why Xanti’d asked the coyote to repay that stupidity with a favor. When the coyote completed the small task, Xanti wordlessly nodded in thanks and chomped on xyr joint. How much more shit can xe get this ashamed idiot to do as payment for his stupidity?
Inhale. The citrusy weed was a dull throb in the lungs.
Exhale. The smoke curled from Xanti’s nostrils. And the light in xyr golden eyes mellowed.
“Wonderful. Mom’s dead. Siblings pressumed dead.” Xanti rolled xyr eyes. Took another inhale. Goddamn, xe’d need this whole fucking joint to make it to xyr den without stabbing an idiot like Kole in the face.
Paws flexed. The cheetah’s claws couldn’t sheathe or unsheathe like most cats, but there was tension. Relief xyr mom was dead—xe’d never liked that bitch—and a bit of relief, too, about the sibling xe’d hated the most. Glad xe didn’t have to see those two idiots anymore. But, damn, xe’d actually liked two of xyr siblings. Internally, xe felt like a tornado carrying a hodgepodge of emotional garbage.
Exhale. More smoke. And the cheetah blinked lazily. Xe shrugged xyr shoulder.
“You want to carry this shit for me?” Xanti had already pulled the satchel off and was holding it to Kole expectantly. “Nothin’ fragile. Bunch of stainless steel metal tools. Easier to sanitize and sharper than bone weapons.”
Xanti ducked into the entrance to the cave system. Xyr weed-dialated eyes blinked in the darkness, in the illuminating torchling.
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Hence why Xanti’d asked the coyote to repay that stupidity with a favor. When the coyote completed the small task, Xanti wordlessly nodded in thanks and chomped on xyr joint. How much more shit can xe get this ashamed idiot to do as payment for his stupidity?
Inhale. The citrusy weed was a dull throb in the lungs.
Exhale. The smoke curled from Xanti’s nostrils. And the light in xyr golden eyes mellowed.
“Wonderful. Mom’s dead. Siblings pressumed dead.” Xanti rolled xyr eyes. Took another inhale. Goddamn, xe’d need this whole fucking joint to make it to xyr den without stabbing an idiot like Kole in the face.
Paws flexed. The cheetah’s claws couldn’t sheathe or unsheathe like most cats, but there was tension. Relief xyr mom was dead—xe’d never liked that bitch—and a bit of relief, too, about the sibling xe’d hated the most. Glad xe didn’t have to see those two idiots anymore. But, damn, xe’d actually liked two of xyr siblings. Internally, xe felt like a tornado carrying a hodgepodge of emotional garbage.
Exhale. More smoke. And the cheetah blinked lazily. Xe shrugged xyr shoulder.
“You want to carry this shit for me?” Xanti had already pulled the satchel off and was holding it to Kole expectantly. “Nothin’ fragile. Bunch of stainless steel metal tools. Easier to sanitize and sharper than bone weapons.”
Xanti ducked into the entrance to the cave system. Xyr weed-dialated eyes blinked in the darkness, in the illuminating torchling.
UNEXPECTED YET EXPECTED —
— i wanted to hate / i wanted to die / i wanted to see you sacrificed / i had to deal with the fear you gave me / but you fucker never tried to help me / i was jealous and i was scared / nobody ever replaced my pain / to say i’m not evil, to tell I’m not bad / too late, i’m lost in human nature / leave me be / set me free / leave me be / set me free / the hardest thing to me is facing the fear i live / no one can help me now, it’s under my heart / i’ll come to know the living, my demons are inside / i’ll bring them all to light / ———— emerged from the dark I come to life!