[size=9pt]/ you want me dead

Moon's taken to walking through the woods. He tells himself it's because it's near the border-- he's keeping an eye out; making sure no one that's not supposed to be there wanders in. But the reality was far more pathetic, and, frankly, Moon was still in denial of the fact that he came here to calm down. When his muscles started to tremble under his skin and his heart climbed up his throat and sat on his tongue and he needed silence, he came to the trees. It helped, being here. Forests just had that way about them.

Today was different, though. It wasn't working. When he found Gabriel in a heaping pile, his breathing was still shallow and his chest still thundering, and he was in no state to help. "Jesus," He coughs instead, a wet, almost frantic laugh coating his words as he rushes to the hybrid's side, shaking his head desperately. The log. What a sick joke. "Fuck. Fuck." He says, sounding fragile and vulnerable like he never has before as he hovers for a second, trying to get his brain to work so he could do something. He lifts a paw to Gabriel's neck, holds it there as his own pulse hammers and waits to see if Feathers still has his. For a moment, there's nothing there, and his mind starts to supply him with the various ways he could go about ridding himself of his own mortality and following the hybrid up those lovely, heavenly stairs. He could down some deathberries. He'd get to see Marg. But then there's the slightest of throbs against his paw pad and he exhales, fast and rough like he's gotten the air kicked out of him.

"Gabe," He begs, attempting to roll the hybrid to face him, words no less frenzied as they were before. "What the hell did you do? What the fuck happened?" He says, and starts to shake him, an almost aggressive effort to get him to come to. "Gabe, open your fucking eyes, you asshole. You don't get to leave, too, okay? I can't cope in this shithole alone."

[size=9pt]Luz de mi vida, Moon hears, and maybe, under other circumstances, ones in which he knew Spanish and Gabe didn't have blood crusting in his eyes, he'd outright laugh and not let the hybrid live it down. Instead, though, he heaves shallow breathes in an effort to get a fucking grip and pours his old Cleric bag out on the ground beside them. His paws aren't shaking when he roots through the old woven sachets and containers, but it's a close thing. Under his breath spills trembling words-- something along the lines of 'crazy Spanish old man' and 'scaring the fuck out of me--'.

His head snaps up at Gabriel's words. Har. "You--" He says, and then stops when something washes over him and takes away his voice. He'd gone to Sunhaven. To make sure Harland was okay. Of course he had. Because it wouldn't be like Gabe to not. "They did this to you?" He manages, when he finds it in himself to piece words together again, and the debilitating feeling of 'I'm so fucking grateful it hurts' ebbs enough for him not to feel so choked up anymore. What replaces it is fury.

"I'll fucking kill them." He says. It's the silent type of anger- the cold, immediate type. A glance into who he once might of been, maybe. And the moment lasts, with the old glass bottle of poppy seeds held so tightly in his grip it's a miracle it doesn't shatter into smithereens, until Gabe croaks his next words.

They thought he killed something. Because this whole thing wasn't already the most colossal clusterfuck of miscommunication the world had ever seen, already. No-- they had to make it that much worse. Moon's face falls blank, and he falls back on his haunches like the weight of the world has just nestled itself into the crook of his neck and now sits, heavy, dragging him into the dirt with Gabe. He takes a moment where he drags his paw down his face, claws unsheathed just enough so they latch against his skin, give him something else to focus on than the fact that the whole goddamn Universe had lost its fucking mind. After what feels like a long time, he speaks, voice muffled by his paw. "Doesn't fucking matter." He says, and with the words comes a realization-- that's just it. It doesn't matter. Nothing fucking matters. "Let them think what they want. Who cares? Who cares? The World's gone fucking mad." He fumbles violently with the lids of the bottle, pours some concoction of pain killers and other seeds he knows won't kill Gabe with frenzied paws. "What the fuck are they good for, anyway? Trading? No one even buys their shit. It's bad fucking customer service." Words spill from his mouth, bordering on frantic, and he takes Gabe's paw roughly and pushes the medicine into his hold. "All that matters is that we get Har back, and that this place doesn't burn to the ground, and that I don't completely fucking lose it--"

Mid-sentence, he finally looks the hybrid in the eye, and stops. The blood. He freezes, voicing losing all of it's bitterness and tremor, and he stares 'till his face shifts and frowns and his lips pull down. "Gabe," He says, as memories suddenly flood in of the state the hybrid's been in for the past- How long? With his stumbling steps and regular disappearance. How the hell has he not realized until now? "What the hell is going on with you?"

[size=9pt]/ it be like that sometimes

"Why did you?" He snaps. "Why did you choose to go? Huh?" A golden gaze, glassy and fierce, stares holes through Gabriel. He breathes heavy, and his voice is harsh. Things are starting to get the better of him, and he's angry and he's worried and he doesn't understand why Gabe would go by himself. Why he'd left Moon in the Ascendants to simmer in his paranoia while he took off to enemy territory, alone, in the state he was. He's getting himself worked up. "Why didn't you come get me? Har-- Har is my responsibility, and look at you-- You're a fuckin' mess. What the hell were we supposed to do if you didn't come back? Think Laz would just-- get over it if you collapsed somewhere before you got to the border and I hadn't found you?" A moment where he pauses, and there's that familiar tightness wrapping itself around his throat again, that wet heat threatening at his eyes. A flood of something that's been building up for a while. "And, me, what was I-- You can't just expect me to--"

He didn't have anyone anymore. Peri was gone. Marg and Suite, dead. He'd been too late to save Har. Hell, even Bast and Hazel had taken off. He'd latched on quicker than he'd realized, and the reality that he couldn't handle it alone was hitting him hard.

He breathes when Gabe tells him to. In, out. In, out. It doesn't work like they say it should. He still feels far from the ground he stands on, still feels like he's being set on fire from the inside out, but after a second- two, three, four- he gets to the point where exhaustion hits him and he falls silent. He sits back, manages to reduce his breaths to quiet, trembling things, and looks to the ground. He lets Gabe's voice spill into his ears and tries not to think about how it sounds like something close to death. After a stretch of nothing, the lion, quieter now, turned in on himself, replies. "You should've come to me earlier. 'Not in that tropical hellhole no more. It's on me to take care of everyone, now, and I don't care what you have to say about it-- That goes for you, too."

He lets that sit, and after a while, he starts to unfold from his turned in shoulders. Eyes that are solemn, sheepish, almost guilty, eventually look up and drift over Gabriel's collapsed figure. "I'm sending you to the Cleric's hide. Lockin' the door and and throwin' away the key. Get ready to see a lot more of me, Feathers, because I'm not lettin' you leave till Hell freezes over."