Beasts of Beyond
If I'm To Die Before You || Healing, Open - Printable Version

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If I'm To Die Before You || Healing, Open - kinglykingstone - 07-23-2018

tw for self deprecation and minor violence. each of the top five stars leads to a different song.
2688 words
DALE COOPER
Sickness plagued the dog, restricting him to his room and his bed. He felt useless as he sat slumped in a pile of blankets and his own sweat. He was tired, and not just physically. He was tired of sitting in his room,iuseless and unable to do anything, or help his friends. He had to sit back and hear from others that Bastilleprisioner had relapsed again, had to hear from Suiteheart herself that she had died,and he didn't know almost anybody in the group because there was so many newcomers.

He couldn't visit the coast, he couldn't stare at the moon with his best friend, he could step away for even a moment. He was helpless and useless and all it did was stir up memories of the past. No matter how many visitors he had, it didn't take away from the fact that he spent so much time alone with only his thoughts to act as his companion. He felt like it was when Harry had- when he- when Harry-... when Harry got sick. Once again, Cooper was too useless to help the ones he cared o. "Diane, I hate this. he mused one night, thoughts buzzing like flies, "Sometimes I get so tired of it all. I miss you, I miss Bobby, I miss Albert, I miss my god damn husband."

He would bury himself under his blankets, as if trying to hide from the world that had laid such a curse upon him. He was slowly starting to give up on getting better, he didn't think he ever would. He just wanted to sleep until he could see Harry again.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

In the beginning, Cooper often had visitors. While this fact has decreased over time, there was one that remained consistent. His dear friend Suiteheart, his closest friend since joining the group. Their friendship had been instantaneous, never once faltering despite all that had had happened. She'd slept at his door many nights, as if acting guard, without him being any the wiser. Apparently she had feared disturbing him.

When he had found out, he gotten onto her for ever thinking that she wouldn't always be welcome in his room. She'd become a comfort for the ill dog, telling him stories of what was going on on the outside and how everyone was. So, when she had gone from showing up daily to not at all for three days straight, his heart had been broken but he suffered quietly. He assumed she had grown too busy to spend every day entertaining a sick dog.

He was fine with it. Well, he wasn't, but he would have dealt. But, she had returned and told him everything that had happened. When she began to apologize, he wrapped his tail around her and, in a soft voice, said "It's fine, I just assumed you didn't have time to visit an old man. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you."

She would push away his apologies, telling him that it was something destined to happen and that he shouldn't blame himself. He wouldn't respond, instead asking for her to share a nap with him, just so that way he could have a physical reminder that she was there and would never leave, just for a few hours.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

In Cooper's mind there was a huge box of confusion just labeled 'Playerone'. No matter what, he couldn't get the image of the hybrid, that had been adopted as his little sister, running at him teeth bared out of his mind. He'd finally gotten the bandages removed but, the bite shaped scarring on his throat would forever remain. He didn't hate Playerone for it though, he knew she wasn't herself. He had known what he was getting himself into when he entered the situation. He had just wanted to be useful for once, damn it.

The encounter hadn't changed anything, not that he would admit to; he still cared for the white feline-fox hybrid, she was still always welcome in his room. There were just moments where he'd catch her in the corner of her eyes and he swore he saw the mark on her shoulder glowing a burning red, a color that flashed in his vision when he closed his eyes. He would never tell her though, she couldn't know that he felt like this. He just wanted her happy.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Cooper's eyes slowly flickered open and he found himself curled a chair covered in black velvet, a chill settling in his bones. He sat up, eyes scanning over the oh-so-familiar room that surrounded him. In place of walls, red curtains lines his vision, stretching endlessly upwards. The floor was a zig-zagging black and white pattern. Two other chairs sat against another "wall", backed by two odd lamps that opened in cones upwards. The only other thing was a side table beside his chair and a large white statue of a woman covering herself with her hands.

His gaze landed on someone sitting in one of the other chairs and it was like peering at a distorted version of himself, one that made his stomach drop. The other canine's fur was long and matter, fur tinted from grime. He wore a patchy snakeskin jacket and a snarl was clear on his face. When the doppelgänger spoke, it was odd and wrong; it was like someone had spoken the sentence backwards and than had played it in reverse. "HelLo DaLE" spoke the copy.

Dale Cooper pushed down a snarl, finding himself filling with distaste. He knew what this... beast was capable of. "Why have you brought me here?" he asked, his voice unaffected by the rooms aura. Speaking of auras, the one in front of him was horrible. Its color was solid, the color of the dark streaks that marred his own golden one.

The beast snickered an awful backwards laugh, a slight twitch to his head. "I simPLy wANt to tAlK" it said, smiling a grin that stretched back to far to be natural. Cooper had the urge to flee but he had nowhere to flee too, he couldn't run home from here.

Cooper let his head droop onto his paws, lacking the energy to keep it upright. He gazed at the distorted version of himself and let words tumble out of himself, "Fine. I'm here. Let's talk." His posture lacked energy and he thought, for a moment, he saw his own aura flicker.

The beast, better known as Mr. C, would sit straighter, now seeming to tower over the sickly canine. His head cocked to the side, one ear flopping in a way that, when Cooper did it, could be seen as adorable but, when done by Mr. C, was just wrong. "yoU faIlED" cooed the gross corruption.

Cooper's heart skipped a beat and he snuffed out a whine, not allowing it to escape. He knew, deep in his heart, exactly what it was referencing but he didn't want to admit to it. "Failed?" echoed the dog, voice quaking. The other's words echoed what Cooper's mind was already telling him.

"You faILEd to prOTecT them." said the being in a twisted lyrical lilt, leaning forwards towards Cooper, who shrunk back into his seat. As exhaustion continued to pull and tug at Cooper, the other looked lively and energetic.

"Who?" whispered Dale, as if his heart and brain hadn't been screaming the answer at him for years now. He began to dig his nail into the upholstery, fighting the exhaustion that was growing. He couldn't fall asleep, not here, not now.

The mat-furred canine bared it's teeth in a grotesque parody of a smile, leaning close enough that their noses nearly touched. "AlL of tHEm. SuITehEArt, HARolD, diANE, PlAYErOnE, lUAra." it growled, met only by a quietly whimpered "I know."

Mr. C pulled away, sitting up straight and leveling the crouching Cooper with a vile glare. "IT'S yoUR fAUlT THey'RE DeAD Or BRokEN" it snarled, causing Dale to flinch backwards into his seat. He began to frantically shake his head, the best he could with so little energy.

"nO?" snarled the beast, carefully hopping off of the seat that had held it for many moments. Cooper watched it with fear as it approached.

"It's-It's not my fault" he cried, tears brimming in his eyes. He let out a loud whimper as teeth sunk into his scruff and dragged him from his chair where he collapsed in a pile on the smooth cold floor. The grip released and the beast took a slight step back, staring down at the pitiful mess before it.

"TheN whO's faULt iS iT?" it asked in a vicious mockery of Cooper's quaking speech, head dipped down to growl directly into Cooper's ear. One of it's paws rested lightly on Cooper's shoulder, as if that was all it took to pin him; and it was. He was weak and drained of energy.

"It's yours." said Cooper quietly, attempting a snarl but finding he lacked the ability to use even that small amount of energy. He felt like he was dying, drained of energy and care.

The beast sunk it's claws into his shoulder and a whimper left the white and brown dog as pain filled his shoulder. "mINE?" snarled the beast, lowering its head to speak directly into his ear. He could it's cold but dry nose press against his fur and a shiver rippled through him. "I aM yOu. I aM the mAniFeSTatiOn oF alL the DarK anD eVIl thINgs You haVE eVeR dOne. I aM thE thINgs yoU keEP frOM your nEw FRiEnDs. do YOu THinK SuitEheaRT woULd stiLL CArE if ShE KNew AbOuT mE?" the beast growled. It's maw wrapped around the poor canine's muzzle, dragging him away from the chairs. It dropped him but kept it's head close. "YoU aRe DAle BArthoLomEW CooPEr. I aM dAlE bARThOlOMeW cOOpEr. I aM yOu. yOU arE mE. wE arE O N E" it snarled loudly, drawing whimpers from the suffering canine who laid prone on the floor.

Cooper was done, he couldn't do this anymore. He was just going to die here, in some far away place, His friends would find his body and most likely assume he'd died in his sleep. A passing more peaceful then reality. As he started to allow his eyes to drift shut, he noticed a jolt go through the other and it clicked in his mind. His friends wouldn't find him dead, no. They would find this beast his place, a beast that would play the role of Cooper while picking them all off one by one.

He couldn't allow that happen, he couldn't fail again. Driven by the sheer force to protect his friends, the ailing dog lunged upwards, aiming to land a killing blow to the other. He met his mark and was met by the warm metallic taste of blood mixed with the bitter grime that had stained Mr. C's fur. A surge of energy rushed through Dale and then darkness.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

When Cooper awoke, he was painfully aware of how alone he really was. The only light in his room came from the stars that shined through his window, giving it all a hazy glow. He still felt pain coursing though his shoulder but upon inspection, he found no visible wound. He could still feel the phantom pain of Mr. C's teeth digging into his muzzle as he was dragged and fear coursed through the canine once more.

With a whimper, Cooper would cover his muzzle with his paws and squeeze his eyes shut. He would come to regret this as images played in his mind of a white beast with glowing red eyes lunging at him followed by a smirking and snarling Mr. C. Cooper recoiled backwards and snapped his eyes open, as if attempting to flee the images that way.

But, no. They were not her, nobody was. He was painfully alone and he had accepted this. No matter how many visitors he received during the day, he would be painfully alone come night time. Cooper had started receiving fewer visitors as the group grew larger while he had to sit back passively and feared being forgotten.

He just hoped that he would heal soon so that way he could rejoin the group and be active. He wanted to be useful and help out the ones he cared about but being so sick made it hard. What if more people got hurt because he wasn't there to protect them? He didn't want to loose another person he cared about because he was useless.

The canine curled up in a ball, wrapping his tail over his muzzle and sniffling. He didn't dare close his eyes for fear of what he might see, remaining awake until exhaustion sunk its claws into his pelt and forced him into a deep and dreamless slumber.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Cooper lifted his head slowly, a familiar scent of forest musk and mint greeting him; one he hadn't smelt since- "H-harry?" coughed the canine, staring blearily at what seemed to be a smokey silhouette of his long-passed husband. Cooper blinked slowly, as if trying to clear his vision; but, when his eyes refocused, his husband was in fact standing in front of him. Though he was now a pale-washed out brown and semi-opaque, instead of the rich brown curls that Dale once buried his face into.

Cooper began to attempt to stand, aiming to stumble towards the spirit. "Coop, Coop, baby please, don't do that" hummed the spirit, causing the ill canine to falter. Cooper collapsed back onto his bed with a huff, staring at Harry in disbelief. The ghostly canine would cross the distance between the two, doing his best to curl around his husband.

Dale was surprised to find that, instead of cold, he was met with warmth like the love the pair had shared for many years. "Are you here to take me with you?" asked the hazel-eyed dog, a slim trace of hope slipping into his voice. He wasn't sure if this was real or some fever dream but he was going to enjoy the moment either way.

The curly-furred spirit chuckled, aiming to nuzzle Cooper's side. "No, Coop, it's not time for you to join me yet. You have too many people here that need you." spoke the spirit softly, nudging Coop's muzzle with his own. It was in that moment that Cooper realized Harry wasn't breathing. You don't need to breath if you're dead, he supposed.
"But I need you, Hare" whined the observer with a tired sniffle.

"I know, baby, I know. Soon, perhaps" was all Harry said as he rasped his tongue over the top of his husband head, pushing the poof that grew there in the wrong direction. As a warmth spread over Cooper, he felt exhaustion pull at his pelt and, despite his fighting, he soon fell asleep.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

When Cooper would regain consciousness again, the ghost of his husband would be gone, as would be the sickness that had been plaguing him for so long. In their place would be a sense of warmth and two silver rings lying at Cooper's paws. On the inside, one had 'Fire Walk - D&H C.T.' and the other 'D&H C.T. - With Me'. He would be quick to slip these onto his pendant's chain, the silver shining under the light that spilled through his window.

The formerly ill canine would crawl off his bed, rising into a standing position. While tiredness did still tug lightly at his bones, it was nothing like it had been before. His paws would lead him through the soot stained halls of the Observatory, ash staining his paws as he left a trail of footprints. Where he was heading, he hadn't an idea, the traveler simply began to wander. While his health was clear, his mind was not. He found himself heading for the beach, to his spot with Suite, though his walk there was slow. He walked with a limp, but no new wounds.
[b]THE ASCENDANTS — OBSERVER — TAGS[/color]
© MADI



Re: If I'm To Die Before You || Healing, Open - Suiteheart - 07-23-2018

SUITE
HEART
Day after day, Suiteheart visited Cooper. He was one of her closest friends - had been a long, long time. He probably knew her better than she knew herself. Even so, the both of them kept secrets, which wasn't necessarily out of the ordinary. Suite, as much as she hated it, withheld information from practically everyone. Some things were better -- easier -- left unsaid.

However, had she known about Cooper's inner demons, the things that kept him awake at night and haunted his dreams, she wouldn't cast him out. Cooper was family, and she loved him. Dark sides, lapses of judgement, worries, fears, past lives... None of that would ever or could ever make Suiteheart stop caring about Cooper. At this point in there friendship, nothing on this earth could wedge a gap in their relationship.

He had accepted all of her many, many flaws. She would accept every single one of his. And she would do it without question, without fail.

Her mind was on the canine as she sat by the sea. Ocean eyes were searching into the vast stretch of blue waves. Her head had been in such a tizzy lately that it didn't even feel as though it were on straight. 'The waves of the sea help me get back to me,' she thought, repeating the mantra in her head over and over and over, until it became ingrained in her brain. Her breathing became relaxed, deep, but peace and calm did not rest easy in her being.

The scent of pine trees wreathed around her. Erlend. 'Why do you let what you cannot change bother you so deeply, young one?' the oldest spirit questioned. Her voice was even and relaxed, and Suiteheart tried to let the original version of herself alter her emotions for the better.

"Because I hate feeling this way, Erlend. I hate that everything is out of my control. I hate not being able to fix -"

'You think too much, child. Calm yourself. Bad situations are bound to alleviate themselves eventually. Everything in our world becomes balanced sooner or later, Suiteheart Folie. You cannot have bad without good,' Erlend explained, her tone never remaining steady.'Trust that the world will even itself out. It always does, young one.'

And just like that, the smell of pine vanished. Erlend had left. Suiteheart inhaled sharply, but she did feel better. Maybe things would work themselves out. Maybe the old Viking was correct. Her fictional eyebrows furrowed in further thought. She hoped Erlend was right. She exhaled, and that's when she heard gentle paw steps.

The white feline turned, and when she spotted who the steps belonged to, surprise marked her features. "Cooper?" she called, pushing herself upwards. She scurried towards him, meeting him halfway to their moon-watching spot.

Her eyes scanned over him, noting only a limp. Concern still bathed her baby blues, but there was something else there: hope. Had Erlend been correct? Was the world finally allowing her a break in the form of a healed friend? She moved forward in an attempt to gently embrace him. "Cooper, I - how did - are you - ... Are you okay?"

[b]suiteheart folie-mikaelson . ecliptic admiral . the ascendants . tags
© [color=black]MADI



Re: If I'm To Die Before You || Healing, Open - BASTILLEPAW - 07-23-2018

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BASTILLEPRISONER AURELIUS
BY THE GRACE OF THE FIRE AND THE FLAMES
Bastille had done his best not to think about Cooper. He couldn't afford to. There was too much fucking going on for him to let himself slip up, and each day the number of lives at his paws went up by the masses, it seemed like: the pressure of knowing that when he crashed and burned he would be taking even more people down with him was weighing on him. He could feel the tension of his souls festering, budding and crackling under the surface, shooting up his spine -- they were restless, rolling, jostling together more and more as his stress rose. In the past few days, he could feel the fine grasp of his control loosening and unraveling, and it was the best he could do to fucking ignore it.

So, he ignored it all. Ignored the burning of anger in his gut every time he saw Suiteheart, letting cold apathy towards her rush through his veins instead. Ignored the nausea when he looked at Hazel and forced himself to pretend he didn't care, to look past her and distance himself. Ignored the worry gnawing at him the longer Cooper stayed under the Clerics' care. He couldn't afford to think about losing Cooper -- not when all it did was remind him of Starry. Not when he saw how sick he was and could feel the budding memories rising to the front of his thoughts, the murmur of whispered words and softly spoken stories, the hushed, "That's him, that's Death's Echo, he'll kill us all." Maybe it was too much to assume that Echo's legacy had caught up to him, but he then he remembered his mother and realized that he could never be certain.

He couldn't risk getting to close, couldn't risk losing someone else because he was a fucking plague.

Bastille had visited Cooper once, and as much as it killed him, he couldn't go back. He could only let Rin and her new Clerics do their jobs and hope for the fucking best, which was awful, but he was nothing if not great at ignoring the world and powering through with vicious apathy. And so he did. He might have carried on that way, ignoring Suiteheart's presence entirely, if he hadn't noticed that Cooper was there, too.

[b]"Coop," he said as he came to a stop, not even sparing Suiteheart a glance, "What're you-- Hey." The greeting came out awkward, edged with something like anticipation, like he was waiting for a catch. He was. "Why are you all the way out here?"
[B]ASTRAL SERAPH — THE ASCENDANTS — [color=#e2e2e2]TAGS[color=#e2e2e2]MOODBOARD[color=#e2e2e2]PLAYLIST



Re: If I'm To Die Before You || Healing, Open - Margaery - 07-24-2018

MARGAERY FOLIE-MIKAELSON
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MAKE ME QUEEN OR
I'LL MAKE YOU BLEED
Cooper's condition had provided Margaery with yet another thing to fret about. It stood next to Bast and Suite's fight, Suite's death, her father, and her own lack of control as each day came and went, adding weight to her fragile shoulders as she tried so desperately to keep her head up. Margaery had never been as close to Coop as Suite had, but that didn't change the fact that she cared deeply for him. He was a good man and her wife's best friend, their friendship rivaling the one Suite had shared with Akira all those months ago. If anything ever happened to him, Margaery would be absolutely devastated and she dreaded that day of her immortal life when she'd finally have to part from him.

But it appeared as if Cooper's condition had taken a turn for the better, especially given the fact that he was out and about and so far from the Observatory. She turned in the direction of the commotion, chocolate-capped paws leading her lean form closer and closer to the trio. She was completely oblivious of Cooper's early struggles, merely permitting a smile to appear upon her lips as she realized that he was very much okay again. That light in her eyes dwindled though, swallowing harshly the moment she sensed the tension between Bast and Suite. Had Cooper not been present, maybe she would have finally grown a spine and say something... But she knew that anything pertaining to that mattered would be more of a berating on her part.

[b]"Oh, love..." She instead elected to breathe, pushing down the feelings of rage and desperation that had begun to accumulate in her chest (though she did hope that Suite was faintly aware of them, aware of her pain), "I'm so glad you're okay." Margaery attempted to sound as bright and cheery as possible, but even her words betrayed a bit of her inner turmoil. No... Stop... She thought angrily to herself. This was about Cooper. Not her. Never her. "How does it feel to be out and about again? We missed you... A lot."
© MADI



Re: If I'm To Die Before You || Healing, Open - Roy Mustang - 07-24-2018

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Roy didn't have many close friends here in the Ascendants. His struggle to genuinely get close to people began at his joining months back- he held almost no trust in any of them. Back then, even if he said he'd join them, the bobcat had no idea what kind of hell he was getting himself into. It felt like to Roy that he'd never warm up to them, and that he'd always feel like an outsider. But, Roy Mustang really surprised himself with how far he's come. He might not have a lot of good friends, and that newcomers/strangers still need to gain his trust, but some is better than none. Someone that Roy managed to click with just happened to be Cooper.

When Cooper fell ill, Roy made sure to visit the canine to give him company. Roy knew how boring it can be to sit in that Cleric's den all day, doing nothing- it's not fun. Roy remembered before he was allowed to walk around after his injury, it felt like time past by so slowly in there. It felt almost draining, as if it'd never come to an end. Roy tried to keep the conversations going, hoping to distract the male from his current condition. Roy didn't want Cooper to die, but he couldn't help it but feel a tiny sense of fear in his chest that he wouldn't make it. Roy trusts the Clerics and the Halos, but Roy isn't entirely used to how medicine is handled in this world. He's so used to modern medicine, it feared him that the herbs provided wouldn't be enough. To distract himself from that fear, and to hopefully make Cooper feel better, Roy remembered exchanging stories with him.

What Roy exchanged with Cooper would hopefully never be told to another person here. Cooper told Roy that he was an ex-agent, the Flame Alchemist learned some things Cooper went through in the past. Some of them were more messed up than others, and that's when Roy decided he could tell Cooper about Ishval. If Cooper was going to trust Roy with certain information that certain ears would hate to hear, then Roy can trust Cooper in return. Telling Cooper about Ishval was difficult, it wasn't everyday Roy openly told someone how he fought in a civil war, and was ordered to help murder thousands and thousands of his own people. Roy isn't perfect, he's done some horrible things that he wished he didn't do- but if he sulked about it and let the guilt take over his mind, Roy wouldn't be able to get out of his bed every morning. Roy wasn't sure how Cooper would take it, but he was surprised when Cooper didn't turn the bobcat away.

Roy wasn't exactly expecting to run across Cooper at the Pebble Coast. The male came to a stop as his blue eyes set on the back of the canine, eyes blinking slowly. Cooper? What was he doing all the way out here for? He's sick, he shouldn't be out here! Roy began to make his way over to the canine, ready to speak his mind to Cooper, when his gaze landed on the male's face. Any sort of thought he had in mind to tell Cooper to return to the observatory instantly disappeared. With one look, Roy had a good feeling in his chest- Cooper must be feeling better. If he was still feeling sick, there's no way he could have made it out here. Even after their talks, Roy still felt a worry in the back of his head. He was still afraid that the illness would take Cooper, even after all the work the Clerics put in saving him. Roy couldn't help it but feel relief begin to run through his veins, that fear beginning to fade. "I'm surprised to see you out here, Cooper," The Flame Alchemist spoke up, ears drawing back to his skull, "you're feeling better, aren't you?"