✯ — no more begging for the bench to call you clean

The thunder crashing overhead was finally growing to a standstill. It was noise he could not stand, not without the past being dredged back up. The past he didn't want to remember. The feelings of being pressed into his lover's side after a stormy evening, that feels g haunted him now, bundled up in his nest as he watched the flashing lightning growing further apart in its bursts of energy. The storm was leaving, and he was aching to get up and walk around.

The day had been filled with thunderstorms from the late morning on. It had been nice at first, until the very first crack of thunder had sent him running indoors, leaving his forge's fire to be drenched by the vicious downpour. He'd stayed within his nest from the time it had chased him inside in a frantic race, his pelt drying and fluffing out over the long solitary hours. He had fallen asleep in the lulls between, reading by candlelight when the wind wasn't harsh and simply watching the storm and praying for it to end.

It had been a while since he'd received the threatening letter alongside the letter from his reaper. He'd been extra vigilant from that point onwards. He couldn't afford not to be. The crows and ravens that hung around the camp hadn't given him any ease, he'd been able to feel their eyes following him everywhere. He prayed to the gods that they would leave already. They were causing him to lose the precious little sleep he already had, their screeches at night often enough to wake him.

Now that the storm was retreating, he was on the move as he heard their wing beats. It was time for his patrol, the mealtime-based patrols that they were. He often came back too tired to do much else than to drop into his nest and sleep. Now, he'd missed his patrols for the day due to the storms, and the memories that lingered in his head but he was out. He needed to patrol to soothe his own mind and thoughts, to soothe a need that had sprung out of nowhere to further ensure everyone's safety.

Heading out of camp alone, the small tom would inhale the scents left by the rain, heavily washing away any previous scents. He was headed towards the border, his soaked avian 'friends' following after him with low croaks, not afraid in the dying light. He knew his paths well - it could be joked that he'd grown up here. Reaching the border, the tom would carry along, replacing scent markers confidently before picking up on a foreign yet familiar scent. It was newer, but he couldn't place the familiarity in the scent. It wasn't like he could call out either - he simply had to look around and try to trace it before giving up. It hadn't crossed their borders, and it didn't remind him of the grims - the scent of death upon it was not the same.

✯ — MALE. THE GOLDEN EYE. MEDIUM DIFFICULTY. REF. LANGUAGE GUIDE. — ✯

✯ — no more begging for the bench to call you clean

Head turning as the scent continued to reach him, his paws slowing. What was that scent? It was tickling something in his mind that he kept buried. Looking back, he was unable to find any visible reasons for the scent, or for that matter any body or individual nearby. Narrowing his gaze for a moment, he would stretch into a downward bow before pushinghis body up and forward, stretching his back legs one at a time. That scent was buried in his head and nose and he didn't like it.

He could taste blood within that scent trail, and he was half inclined to follow it. He was the closest thing the golden eye had to a medic, and he didn't exactly mind that, but it also meant that the decision to seek out this scent was his. Biting his lip as he stood there, mud squishing between his toes as he kneaded at the ground in his uncertainty, weighing his options. The birds wheeling above and settling on nearby trees did nothing to ease his worries. Head turning, he looked up to the dying sky and made his decision. He'd look for the owner of this scent, even though his instincts were screaming to run away, the owner vaguely coming to mind. Hell, he'd been in his mind for days, for years since the incident.

Taking a deep breath, he would leave one more scent marker before putting a paw over the border, jumping at the suddenly raucous cawing and shrieking from the ravens and crows. Eyes flying up to his personal symphony calling for his death, his ears laid back to his head. He wasn't scared. He was the grim of the God of Death - death was a customary thing to him, as normal to him as a new life was born. He wasn't scared of death or anything that followed it. If he met his end here, then that meant that there was a purpose, and with the god's blessing, he would continue to live on.

Shaking his head to clear his cloudy head, he began to track the scent trail with a curl of his tail. It was a canine scent, under everything else. He could only remember Damion and his teeth, the vision of Tsundoku's teeth flashing in his mind's eye. Shaking in his place, he took a few breaths to calm his suddenly racing heart as the memories called back to him. The birds around him started to scream louder and louder as the realization hit him. this scent belonged to tsundoku! Quick came the scramble to escape, to get as far away as he could from his ex-lover. The years had only proven to him that the relationship couldn't be fixed after that attack, though he had tried his hardest. He knew it wasn't safe any longer, but he couldn't lead the other back to camp. It was night time and few of them had excellent night time sight.

His voice came out on a tiny gasp, causinghim more pain than anything and likely alerting the other to his presence. He had slipped in the mud, mud coating his face and covering his eyes and paws as he tried to scrape it away so he could see. Trembljng as he tried to clean his vision, his ears shaking as they rotated, searching for him, searching for the villain of his story, his breath racing about his lungs with anxiety. What was going to happen to him?

✯ — MALE. THE GOLDEN EYE. MEDIUM DIFFICULTY. REF. LANGUAGE GUIDE. — ✯

✯ — no more begging for the bench to call you clean

The voice made him quake and shiver, his breath caught harshly in his throat. He was scared, oh so scared. Shaking as he held his breath, knowing the sound of thunder could cover it but he didn't dare move. What in the hell was he doing here!? Why was Tsundoku here!? A choked sob left him, the mute cowering to the ground. Gods be damned, why was he so cowardly!? He could get up and run but he was glued to the ground where he had been before. His heart nearly left out of his chest when the next clap of lightning and thunder came, illuminating the kitsune some distance away.

Tears ran down his face unbidden now. He pressed himself closer to the ground as the ravens and crows wheeled above him, his eyes wide open as he tried to hide his gray furred body in the low bushes he had been passing by. He prayed to the gods that he wouldn't be noticed. If he wasn't noticed, he could escape. These hopes were dashed as a raven dive-bombed him at the flash of lightning, its talons raking through his fur. The tom flattened himself further to the ground, tears in his eyes as another raven dove down, scoring his shoulders with it's talons, effectively creating a wound. His blood would permeate the air, hot against the chill of the rain upon his fur.

He threw his gaze in the last place he'd seen Tsundoku, praying he hadn't caught the scent of blood. If he had, it didn't mean anything good for the grim. Nothing good at all. If the other was still as cruel as he remembered in that fateful attack .... swallowing anxiously, he tried to back up slowly, hating that there was a hill behind him. He'd be seen if he was to streak back up it but he hadn't extended his patrols past the borders yet. He didn't know this area at all. Turning his body to try and make a quick escape, a muffled screech would leave him, paw slipping into a gopher's hole and twisting, his ragged breathing now audible. His body was sprawled on the ground, the pain and memories teaming up to bear down on him, his scent of terror bleeding through the air.

✯ — MALE. THE GOLDEN EYE. MEDIUM DIFFICULTY. REF. LANGUAGE GUIDE. — ✯

✯ — got spirits in my head and they won't go

His ears switched back, his body shaking and trembling as the kitsune appeared before him, frantic pants escaping him as he stared up at him. No, no, no! His eyes were locked on the teeth that were visible each time he spoke, his whole body trembling. He was curled up beside his lover, the sound of rain washing on the ground outside, head on his flank with soft purrs escaping him. Things were peaceful and relaxing. He was listening to Tsundoku speak, something about how his day had went. Then it was all red and black and chaos with the flashing of canine teeth. The brief interlude into his memories was over as soon as it had begun. Frightened groans were coming from that strangled throat, whites of his eyes showing.

How could he not know him? They'd been together once upon a time, on a day much like this when it had all splintered apart. It had fallen apart with a crack of thunder and a faint sound he couldn't have hoped to have made out. His gaze moved past the teeth to the face finally, hiccuping frantically. He knew him, and he regretted it. Body shaking as he stared at him, jaws working helplessly as sobs shook him, pink tongue trembling within his maw, pressing to the roof of his mouth as he tried to form words to speak. He'd forgotten he'd lost his voice because of this man before him.

His claws slid from their sheathed subconsciously, gaze darting down, down to the kitsune's paws. There was only one way to know for sure if this was the one who haunted his dreams. Gaze finding his right front paw in the muck, he swallowed quickly as he took in the sight of the missing digit, his throat suddenly parched and dry. This was him. This was Tsundoku. He'd taken that digit so long ago, an instinctual response to being attacked - his body had reacted on its own and he'd impeded him long enough to put distance. He didn't want to think about the rest of it.

He could only wordlessly stare with the fear of the gods in him, jaw working helplessly as pained groans and moans left him. His paw ached so bad, pressed tightly to his own form, shivering as he tried to make his body move and scramble back. "Tsundoku. Stay away from me ... I mean it!", would come the telepathic voice that attempted to contact the kitsune. It sounded the same as his original voice, one that had not been heard in years. His gray eyes were the same, his whole body was the same though darkened from being drenched and skinnier after countless nights and days of stress wearing at him. The three scars on his throat were stark and ragged, a reminder of what the other had done to him - a wound that should have killed him but he'd been saved by the reaper he served.

!!!!!!!Powerplay is completely allowed on him!!!!!!! - teef

✯ — MALE. THE GOLDEN EYE. MEDIUM DIFFICULTY. REF. LANGUAGE GUIDE. — ✯

✯ — got spirits in my head and they won't go

'Little rabbit'. His eyes flashed darker with fear. One of his old pet names. From happier times. From before the pain, before he'd learned to run from his feelings. They were sharing breath now, feline eyes looking into canine ones. There was no regret in those eyes and he didn't know if he was scared of that, or if he was scared that he didn't expect there to be any. He was right, he couldn't physically scream. He couldn't call for his groupmates telepathically either - if they got dragged into this, he could only see a bloodbath. Eyes squeezing shut as he held his breath from the rancid smells on the kitsune.

He was shocked when the other created space, his body tensing up automatically. Could he make an escape? Where was he to escape to, though? He couldn't lead the kitsune back to camp. Shaking eyes held onto the form that was now circling him. Each pawstep made him flinch, his throat closing off with fear. He knew what he had done and would do again now that he'd found him. He couldn't risk his son, not yet his son. He couldn't risk the one friend he was making, and nor could he risk Arlo, Damion, Cleopatra, or any others to this monster. He couldn't let them put their lives down for him if they found them. They all meant too much to the Talonguard. They were worth meeting darkness for.

His gaze hardened, the trembling slowly left him. He had his family in his mind, people he needed to protect. It would be okay if something happened to him, as long as he could protect them. "No. I know what you've done. I'm going to make you pay for it.", his actions were followed by the clang of a dagger sliding from it's sheath, iron blade in a crazy slashing matter at tsundoku. It was an attempt to keep him back, to make him move, to create distance. It didn't matter if it cut into the muzzle and leg he aimed for. He needed to cause a distraction, something to infuriate the insane man before him. It was then that he remembered he enjoyed the hunt.

✯ — MALE. THE GOLDEN EYE. MEDIUM DIFFICULTY. REF. LANGUAGE GUIDE. — ✯